When my friends and I were young and stupid we decided late one night while on a fast food run that it would be a wonderful idea to “ghost ride the whip”. This was long before that Drake song became a thing and viral videos were still cats, about 10 years ago. Long story short, it looked like that scene out of The Big Lebowski where Walter tells the Dude to take the wheel and just tucks and rolls out of the car, including realizing I screwed up as I watch my car rolling driverless down the street. At this point I have broken into a full sprint and I’m chasing my poor Kia Forte down the street with the door hanging wide open. As I finally start catching up to the driver door, already getting ready to just hop back in like a badass and keep driving, I see my friend in the passenger seat jumping over to the driver seat and just slam on the breaks. Before I know it, I have slammed into my driver door, flipped over it and landed on my ass with the wind knocked out of me. To add insult to injury, when I do hop back in, all of us laughing, because young and stupid, I go to shut my door and the thing wont close. I hyper-extended the door when I hit it and ruined the hinge. We freaked out and took it to a body shop the next morning before anybody woke up to try and fix it before my parents found out. All they could do was pull it so the door actually latched shut but I had to live with it like that for months. I told my parents that I slipped in the rain and accidentally fell into the door. I don’t think they ever truly believed it but could never figure out what we actually did. Thank god for good friends who will back up whatever half-brained story you come up with. We haven’t had that car in a few years and now that I’molder it has become a pretty funny story.

That or adding a chandelier to the dome light in my ‘06 Scion xB. That greenhouse was so expansive it just made sense. Even got me out of a speeding ticket once when the cop is in the middle of his shtick and just stops and goes “...is...is that a chandelier?” He then calls over his partner to come see it, we share a laugh, and they tell me to slow down. 10/10, would install a chandelier again.

I’ve been here for ages, can I no longer be gray?