I don’t much care to drink, so I ended up as the designated driver on more than one evening. One night my friends were being especially obnoxious while drunk and decided to play the “Kick the seat and then deny kicking the seat” game. So I decided to play the “I’m gonna kill us all game.”

At the time I had a 1987 Cougar XR-7. It was plenty fast for my needs, but my friends saw a 5.0L V8 and thought it was some kinda beast. Again, it was fast but not that fast.

It’s one key feature, for this story, was a button that would change the digital display from MPH to KPH. So when nobody was looking I set the display to KPH and jam on the gas. The sudden surge makes everyone look at the dash and they see a giant “120" and assume, in their drunken state that we are doing 120 MPH when we are in fact doing about 75MPH = 120KPH.

Everyone screams. I roll the windows down for dramatic wind and declare that if my seat gets kicked one more time I’m “GOING FOR 130!!!”

Nobody kicked my seat for the rest of the ride.

Drunk bastards though my 1987 Mercury could do 130MPH.....