Sorry in advance for the lengthy post.

NO WHITE CARS. I will not own, rent, or even drive a friend’s car if it is white.

It started in high school. My Mom had an ‘87 Prelude Si that I drove to babysit for my church youth group leader. They were late getting home, I was tired, so they handed me a wad of cash and I headed home. Even though it was a 5spd, I SOMEHOW MANAGED TO RUN A LIGHT AND T-BONE A CAR-IN FRONT OF THE POLICE STATION. I only had my DL for 2 weeks.

Mom replaced that with a white Audi 5000 Avant, and foolishly let me take it out to cruise town and hang out with friends at the mall. I was going to be really cool and do a J-turn, so I built up some speed in reverse, but before I swung it around, I realized it was a bad idea and slowed to a normal speed. BUT, when I turned the wheel to drive back to my friends, the outside front tire BROKE OFF and the entire wheel and axle jammed under the car.

Fast forward a few years, and for my Mom’s 50th birthday, my best friend and I decided to surprise her with a trip to Fiesta Texas and Sea World in San Antonio. By then, Mom had learned her lesson, and I had a shit car, so I rented a triple white LeBaron Convertible for the trip. It was brand new, off the truck, and I was the first renter. An empty champagne bottle somehow ended up in the area where the top stowed, and I BUSTED THE REAR WINDOW when I put the top down. My boss was cool, we replaced the window and put the car in service. 3 weeks later, a kid was trying to see how fast it would go, didn’t see a sharp, blind corner and sailed through a field and over a 40 foot cliff INTO THE COLORADO RIVER.

Then, a few years later, I was driving my boyfriend’s white Acura Legend when I was REAR ENDED in Dallas, totalling his car.

My car at the time was a GTI, again white (I chose white because of the Texas heat), but got in way over my head with the note, then lost my job, and it was REPO’D.

A couple more years go by with no drama when my brother decides that we need to go see my sister on the East Coast to deliver some “family heirloom” furniture. I’m working for another rental company, and find that the only SUV that had a receiver was a 4Runner. So at the start of my shift, I set aside the only one on the lot, which happened to be a brand new, white 4Runner. By this point, my phobia of white cars was well and truly cemented in my mind, but I had to have it in order to tow a u-haul to carry the furniture. Half way through Louisiana, I caught a rock or something that CRACKED THE WINDSHIELD. I had the damage waiver for it, so I was not worried about the cost, but decided to call my boss anyway. My options were to keep driving it, or go to the New Orleans location to swap cars, which I couldn’t do because I was not supposed to be towing anything. So after 2700 miles in 5 days, I was able to return the original car. Windshield fixed, it was put back in service only to be REVERSED INTO A BOLLARD at a high rate of speed in the rental lot causing extensive damage to the rear of the car. A month or so later, it was back on the road and managed to complete 5 more rentals before being TOTALLED by a customer who had way too many drinks at the lake and tried to make it back to his hotel.

So, at the age of 35, I had finally learned my lesson. NO MORE WHITE CARS.