What will it take? Simple, promise me the following:

1) I won’t have to tell it how to get to the address I’ve given.

2) don’t have it tell me it won’t take me there (unless it’s something silly like out of state, or 500 miles away).

3) have it determine the most efficient route where I don’t wonder if the driver is making extra off the distance.

4) no tip

5) don’t have the driver feign lunch or a flat or some other bullshit excuse for not taking the fair.

6) have AC and be clean, and not smell like crap

7) a smooth ride where I don’t feel like I’m going to die, but not slow where I feel like I could walk faster.