Various Land Cruisers in Namibia...

Broke the rear differential of an FJ62 somewhere in the Kaokoveld. Pulled the front diff assembly, swapped it into the back, kept driving in 2wd.

Lost a bolt in the steering linkage of the same FJ62. Found a slightly bigger bolt, screwed it in there real hard, drove home.

Lost the electrical system of an HZJ75 in the Messum Crater. Couldn’t start the engine. Bypassed the fuel cutoff solenoid, built a fire, boiled some water. Put the glowing coals under the sump to warm up the oil, poured the boiling water over the intake manifold, pushed the car down a hill to start it. Left the engine running until I got back to Windhoek (in the dark, with no lights).

Holed the radiator of the same HZJ75. Limped to the nearest town, obtained 2 packs of curry powder. Mixed curry powder with 5 litres of water, poured into radiator. Topped up system, burped it, topped it up again, drove home. The curry-plug lasted for 3 days before breaking, spilling all over my driveway making it smell fantastic.

Hit some wildlife at 100km/h on a remote stretch of road with an HZJ79, smashing the bullbar into the bodywork. (Top tip: Never cheap out on the bullbar. ARB makes a good bullbar.) Miraculously stayed rubber side down. Needed to check the radiator for damage; strapped bullbar to a tree, put the Cruiser in 4-low and reversed about 6", letting me open the bonnet. Radiator was fine. Zip-tied my headlights into position, closed the bonnet with a ratchet strap, drove home.

Land Cruisers are tough as nails. But if you’ve never broken anything, you haven’t been anywhere.