Time Frame: Dec 1997, right before Christmas
Location: Denver, CO
Situation: Need to drive to Seattle to drop off a liked, but I only have a motorcycle as reliable transportation, and there is a HUGE snow storm about to destroy the entire span of the Colorado Rockies.

I zip over to my nearest car rental place, and tell them I’m in a huge problem. My car is broke, and my gf has run into a huge emergency and drop of the hat needs to get from point A to point B in a damn hurry, and she doesn’t have enough money for plane tickets. I need a car, and stat, and I really don’t care what it is.

Somehow, this pack of lies works on the cute girl at the rental counter, and she manages to pull the only car not accounted for in their lot for a couple of days, and gives it to me for cheaper than the normal rate.

The car: A 1996 Ford Aspire.
The oddity: It’s a manual, and she said that no one who rents a car at Christmas wants a car that small, that is a manual.

The overall problem: Oh my god, those tires are so BALD. Did I mention that I’m going to drive this underpowered pile of crap THROUGH the Rockies, in a HUGE snowstorm? On roads I’ve never driven on before, at night.

Of course, back in 1997, I was much healthier, and full on stupid.
I hopped in that car, with a couple changes of clothes, and started driving North West from Denver. I was also quite enthused about spending time with a nice girl who really liked me at the time, right at Christmas, with a great present in hand.

So I drove, and I drove, and I learned that a Ford Aspire has nearly no power going over the Continental Divide, which turns out to be a good thing, because there was several feet of snow through most sections of Utah, and Idaho. I used ever set of tractor trailer tracks to get as much traction as I possibly could, and when I was snow busting, I did everything I could to maintain momentum going up and down mountains.

I also learned that the heater in the car was not really capable of keeping the windshield defrosted in those weather conditions, and that the wiper blades needed to be de-iced every 50 miles, tops. I also learned exactly how cold a small hatchback can be in the middle of winter, with a nearly non-functioning heater.

I got to Seattle within 24 hours, and was exhausted.

Finally, my final lesson of this trip was what it was like to be rejected by a girl you liked, and what type of thoughts go through your mind as you drive back the way you came, through the same damn snowstorm you just plowed through, with no heat, and no good thoughts to keep you going, in a really shitty car.