3 A.M. Midwestern country road. I pulled over on the grassy, wooded shoulder in the middle of nowhere, to do some stuff I didn’t want to do while in motion, I think looking up something online on my phone. Total quiet, total dark. Just me and my dome light and my phone.

Appearing just outside my window: a bloody, mangled face and matted hair. Like from a horror movie.

First thought: I’m hallucinating.

Second thought: I’m (lucid) dreaming.

Third thought: This is a prank.

None of the above.

Bloody face starts pounding on my car and mumbling. I call 911. Two police cars arrive really fast — maybe within a minute. Two cops jump on the guy and handcuff him.

Turns out the guy was high out of his mind, had crashed his car, didn’t want to get busted for DWI so just crawled away somewhere — the cops already knew about the crash and were just looking for the guy.