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    MarcelineMichael Harriot
    12/27/18 9:03pm

    Were you high when you watched it? Because this column feels like the result of having watched it high.

    That’s not criticism, BTW. I was stoned as fuck when I watched it and I’m still thinking about plot holes and questions I want answered. For ex: what did they do with Greg’s body after he died?

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      Pbuck91Marceline
      12/27/18 10:19pm

      Right? I guess that dude’s just rotting upstairs in that house. Also, like what if you pass out or someone chokes you unconscious before you can kill yourself? Do you wake up crazy like the other people or are you just like "Well, time to try this again". The concept behind the movie was interesting to me, but the execution left a bit to be desired. I would be interested in reading the book though. 

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      Michael HarriotMarceline
      12/27/18 10:42pm

      I am offended by that insinuation!

      Also... maybe.

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    Optimistic PrimeMichael Harriot
    12/27/18 5:56pm

    Did this movie really need not one but two black guys to sacrifice themselves for the white folks? I also guess black women don’t make it through the apocalypse

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      Rooo sez BISH PLZOptimistic Prime
      12/27/18 6:39pm

      I also guess black women don’t make it through the apocalypse

      I have all kind of theories on that.

      I might ask N.K. Jemisin if she can world build a planet for a better ending

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      Baldwin'sApprenticeOptimistic Prime
      12/27/18 6:59pm

      To my knowledge, The Matrix trilogy are the only movies in the entire history of American movies to EVER buck the “only whites (or at least an extremely disproportionate percentage of whites) survive the outbreak/cataclysm/apocalypse” rule.

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    Raineyb1013, Misfit Black Girl Island DenizenMichael Harriot
    12/27/18 6:27pm

    You must have hit a nerve because there’s a tsunami of white tears in the grays today.

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      ColemanSenseiRaineyb1013, Misfit Black Girl Island Denizen
      12/27/18 6:49pm

      I saw this comment and I was like, “Oh? How bad could it be?”

      Clicked Pending.

      AHH! MY EYES!!

      You weren’t kidding.

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      Baldwin'sApprenticeRaineyb1013, Misfit Black Girl Island Denizen
      12/27/18 7:08pm

      And apparently it was important enough for that tsunami to go to the trouble of immediately creating huge numbers of accounts just to do so! It’s that sudden uncontrollable urge to “refute” from people who are otherwise oblivious to downright blatant racial bigotry 24/7 that makes it painfully hilarious!

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    iculookinMichael Harriot
    12/27/18 2:56pm

    This is the best possible analysis of that trash ass movie lol. I really wonder if Netflix digs in a hat to pick which film they’ll make and another hat to choose the cast.

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      Borg Queeniculookin
      12/27/18 3:08pm

      Sandra Bullock is... not a good actress.  Not terrible but extremely meh.  I think a lot of people felt sorry for her after it came out that dude she was with was a Nazi so everyone went to see her movies and she won her White Savior Oscar but overall, not very good.

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      not a ghost accountBorg Queen
      12/27/18 3:51pm

      Jesse James is a Nazi? Please explain. Simply being white and enjoying firearms does not make you a racist if those were your examples.

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    Monique JudgeMichael Harriot
    12/27/18 5:36pm

    Brilliant. 

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      carlvenkmanMonique Judge
      12/27/18 9:35pm

      But can’t decide which is more brilliant. Michael Harriot’s breakdown, or the fact his explanation has the whole internet acting like Greg’s neighbors. Brilliant indeed.

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      WillyDcarlvenkman
      12/28/18 6:43am

      Thank you for seeing this. Not enough stars in the cosmos.

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    A Drop of Hell, A Touch of StrangeMichael Harriot
    12/27/18 3:54pm

    Reading this article I can’t for the life of me figure out what the actual plot of this movie might be. But I’m convinced I shouldn’t bother watching it, so thanks.

    Also:

    I believe Chucky is just a misunderstood little doll who can be a little boisterous at times.

    He’s the same in his human form as the red-headed boy from Problem Child. 

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      DentonedandconfusedA Drop of Hell, A Touch of Strange
      12/27/18 4:45pm

      It’s basically the a quiet place with a shitter plot, and sight instead of sound being the monster(which makes no sense, for one thing how would you know if it was ever safe to take the blindfolds off since the “evil” can look like anything or anyone. These idiots spend half the movie able to see and just magically know the monster isn’t one of the many objects they can now see.

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      StuffDentonedandconfused
      12/27/18 6:50pm

      My interpretation of the evil being in the movie is that it triggers your brain to feel the most depressed it can possibly feel.

      Imagine a time when you were really depressed. When a pet died, when a loved one died, etc. Something like that, except you don’t have your rational mind to keep you in check. So, you feel so depressed you want to kill yourself. And well, you do.

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    RyanLNMichael Harriot
    12/27/18 3:24pm

    “Even in the apocalypse, Tom finds a way to keep his edge-up fresh as he tries to saves all the white people from racism.”

    Never gave a second thought to that while watching the movie but this had me laughing so hard people were stopping by my office to see what was wrong.

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      SouthwestfinestRyanLN
      12/27/18 5:10pm

      how about it took five years for power and lights to go out lmao?

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      AbFabGabRyanLN
      12/27/18 7:14pm

      I’ll at least give them points for continuity on this. When he was at the grocery store he grabbed every last razor they had - he was determined to go out as fresh and clean as the end of the world would allow.

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    bun_up_tun_upMichael Harriot
    12/27/18 7:00pm

    I thought I lost it at Tom’s edge up (was wondering why he didn’t have an afro), but uncle Tom has left me choking 🤣

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      CousinPambun_up_tun_up
      12/27/18 9:37pm

      Especially since Sandra Bullock’s hair went from chin-length to waist-length in the five years that passed.

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      Ninja What?bun_up_tun_up
      12/28/18 12:36am

      I was like “did they find clippers at the grocery store?” especially cuz they made a point of making her hair long to show that time passed

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    MarcelineMichael Harriot
    12/28/18 8:53am

    Donald Trump made a cameo appearance as “Gary.” Gary Trump’s shenanigans killed most of the cast (even the old white people) because after they let him in, he gained their trust and then forced them to look racism squarely in the eyes.

    Nope. Gary is Bernie Sanders. He tricked his way into the house, availed himself of their food and amenities, then proceeded to tear down all of their defenses in order to force them to see how beautiful his white supremacy utopia could be. Olympia is Susan Sarandon. A gullible white woman who put everyone at risk because she fell for his lies.

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      FiveLiters1Marceline
      12/28/18 10:02am

      I love this.

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      DeezNUTZZZZZZMarceline
      12/28/18 8:35pm

      Very good :D 

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    Rooo sez BISH PLZMichael Harriot
    12/27/18 5:18pm

    Because of their uncle Tom, the white children learn that they can ignore racism, too 

    Image for article titled
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