Kinja reply list

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Bart FargoDan Neilan
1/11/18 2:02pm
I was having a pretty good day today. I’d aborted over a dozen babies, I’d gotten a couple of conservative co-workers fired for “hate speech”, and so for lunch I decided to visit Wendy’s. Not to purchase any food—like my fellow elites I only eat artisan kale salads prepared by women in hijabs— but rather to mock the hard-working real Americans I openly despise and who I try to destroy through my support of things like equal labor laws. Much to my noodley, flaccid consternation, the customer in front of me, a massive hunk of divine masculinity bedecked in his trademark red MAGA cap, ordered his Classic Double with extra tomato! Suddenly I swooned, fear and terror rocking me to my soft, presumably homosexual core. Stepping over me, the bearded alpha leaned down into my quivering face, a mask of primal submission as I faced my superior in every way, and asked, “feeling triggered, lib?” Then he laughed and stepped over my wretched, fact-loving body and stepped out into the night.
I had been owned! Right there in the store!
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  Sam Neil Patrick HarrisBart Fargo
  1/11/18 2:07pm
  At least you got your George Soros check in the mail
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  Paul KinseyBart Fargo
  1/11/18 2:12pm
  How dare you post such a vile story without a trigger warning!
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nmiller7192Dan Neilan
1/11/18 1:51pm
“Rapist Mexicans are stealing our jobs! But I’ll completely support it because a company wants to do it and it makes libtards angry!”
Any person that takes part in this non-boycott better not say shit about taking care of blue collar workers or how awful globalism is ever again.
Actually, I think this could be interesting! If liberals just pretend to be mad about something, we can get conservatives to support it!
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  mrm138nmiller7192
  1/11/18 1:59pm
  Ooh! Great idea!
  Man, it really pisses me off when people treat women and minorities with respect and dignity!
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  The Nesquikeningnmiller7192
  1/11/18 2:03pm
  I am liberal as hell and am totes mad that Lorde will absolutely be performing at my birthday party next month. Someone make her stop!
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Mr GlitchDan Neilan
1/11/18 2:05pm
This is the kind of awful shit I like to point to whenever someone demands that liberals need to “understand” conservatives, especially Trump-supporting conservatives, better. I understand enough.
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  TRT-XMr Glitch
  1/11/18 2:12pm
  The one thing I understand about Trump voters is how little they understand about anything.
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  jamboxdotcomMr Glitch
  1/11/18 2:13pm
  Trump supporters aren’t even conservatives, they’re nihilist assholes.
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JujyMonkey: unstable geniusDan Neilan
1/11/18 1:53pm
Man, it must be exhausting to be a racist, contrarian, asshole all the time like these dudes.
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  XanderpussJujyMonkey: unstable genius
  1/11/18 2:00pm
  GATTA STIKE IT TOO THE LIBTURDS!!!
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  natureslayerJujyMonkey: unstable genius
  1/11/18 2:05pm
  I think it’s kind of easy. Just listen to whatever Fox News says and do that. Happened to Trump this morning where he was “convinced” to not support the surveillance bill his administration wants.
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The_MisanthropeDan Neilan
1/11/18 1:52pm
What if you just hate raw tomatoes on your sandwiches and burgers? It’s the worst when you ask them to leave it off but they forget to; even if you pick it off, it’s already left its residue on the sandwich. No part of my sandwich should bleed!
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  TAMPAXThe_Misanthrope
  1/11/18 1:59pm
  I wouldn’t mind finding a small scorpion or two in my sammie.
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  greenspanDan2The_Misanthrope
  1/11/18 2:03pm
  a good burger SHOULD bleed.
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Decepticons ForeverDan Neilan
1/11/18 2:06pm
“Por favor, Señorita Wendy! The scorpions...they come for my husband last night! Please! Please contribute a penny towards our defense! We can hire many brave warriors with this amount!”
“You dare question your mistress, Servitor? GUARD!”
“Si, my Lady?”
“Show our little protestant how Dave liked to deal with spirited little egalitarians. Extra onions, no bacon.”
“It will be done.”
“Noooo! One day, Wendy! One day we will rise up! Diabla! Perra Malvada! PERRA MALVAAAADA—(gurgle).”
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  Bird MILFDecepticons Forever
  1/11/18 2:21pm
  Sir or ma’am, it’s posts like these that keep the AV Club becoming a true, post-Kinjafication hellscape. Have a star.
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  Mr GlitchDecepticons Forever
  1/11/18 2:53pm
  *Jack-booted & pigtailed redhead thugs march across the land*
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the ghost of eazy eDan Neilan
1/11/18 2:20pm
Can I not eat at Wendy’s because it sucks?
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  Elizabeth Montgomery Clift, Honeythe ghost of eazy e
  1/11/18 2:29pm
  Because it cucks.
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  Martian Lawthe ghost of eazy e
  1/11/18 2:30pm
  Fast food choices should be made according to politics NOT taste.
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AlienJesusDan Neilan
1/11/18 2:00pm
Even the “real” Wendy didn’t put those goddamn tomators on her sammicch
Ooooops!
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  Pope FrancisAlienJesus
  1/11/18 2:10pm
  I’d eat her sammich, if you know what I mean.
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  BeasterlyAlienJesus
  1/11/18 2:10pm
  Oh I miss her. Except in my dreams.
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Ugh.Dan Neilan
1/11/18 2:12pm
I’ve read no fewer than three extremely stupid things today. This is #4, but #1 in my heart.
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  Kirk Cameron Left Me BehindUgh.
  1/11/18 2:53pm
  More like in your fart—AMIRITE?
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  Ugh.Kirk Cameron Left Me Behind
  1/11/18 3:02pm
  I HAVE BEEN OWNED!
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ArgieBargieDan Neilan
1/11/18 2:28pm
Stupid Right-wingers and their petty ways. You know what really triggers those Starbucks latte-sippin’ snowflake cucks? Holding your breath for 10 minutes. You should totally try it!
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  Mr GlitchArgieBargie
  1/11/18 2:50pm
  Bleach is a precious natural resource. Callously wasting bleach, by, say, drinking entire gallons of it, really cheeses us libtard snowflakes off.
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