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    Mount_PrionCaity Weaver
    5/28/13 3:09pm

    Reminder: Will Smith is a scientologist, and an especially evil one (although I don't know/care about his swinging). Dude n' wifey spent a lot of money building a scientologist school, so not only are they supporting an institution that bullied the US government into tax-free status and keeps human slaves, they're indoctrinating the youth into it.

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      GregSamsaMount_Prion
      5/28/13 3:13pm

      I read Lawrence Wright's Scientology expose with alternating agape and wincing jaw, and I am surprised it doesn't get cited more often in all things celebrity. It's a nasty, oppressive, useless cult with roots so deep in bullshit I'm surprised there's any earth for it to cling to.

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      JezebelledMount_Prion
      5/28/13 3:16pm

      Just like Every Other Religion Ever.

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    Caity WeaverCaity Weaver
    5/28/13 3:12pm

    Attention all Students of Patterns: Identify a pattern from your life!

    Letters forming words in a systematic way: that's a pattern!

    People being born and eventually dying: that's a pattern!

    Chevron: That's a pattern!

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      Johnny ChundersCaity Weaver
      5/28/13 3:18pm

      I think white noise and amorphous phases must be like kryptonite to the Family Smith.

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      doublylinkedlistsCaity Weaver
      5/28/13 3:20pm

      Things are made out of stuff. You even notice that one thing can also be two things? And adding a bunch of stuff to a bunch of stuff leaves you with ONE bunch of stuff? Everything is one thing. Boom.

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    Johnny ChundersCaity Weaver
    5/28/13 3:09pm

    I like math. Math is nice. Please don't bring math into this...whatever it is, crazy people.

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      Faster,Pussycat!Shrill!Shrill!Johnny Chunders
      5/28/13 3:20pm

      The major contributions crazy people have made towards the advanced of mathematics are indisputable, but this is just numerology.

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      Johnny ChundersFaster,Pussycat!Shrill!Shrill!
      5/28/13 3:21pm

      Good point. Crazy, nonrigorous people.

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    destor23Caity Weaver
    5/28/13 3:21pm

    When I look at some one like Will Smith or Tom Cruise and see that, Scientology or not, they have basically convinced themselves that there is some cosmic purpose to their outsized good fortune I am not all that surprised. If I had all of that money, attention and freedom, I might well make up a super hero story to explain it, too. It kind of goes with Patton Oswalt's theory of why major stars do stupid things — they have to see how far they can push it, just to make sure they're in the real world. Schwarzenegger is Oswalt's example. How else do you explain the secret child with the maid if not as the big guy testing the boundaries of the matrix?

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      hilikusopusdestor23
      5/30/13 4:41pm

      See also: Last Action Hero.

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    jub-jubbouvierCaity Weaver
    5/28/13 3:40pm

    Clearly, the not-at-all one-sided feud between Will and Janet Hubert has taken its expected physic toll and is being handed down through the generations (multidimensional math? wardrobes exclusively by target? Will, you need to end this for the sake of your young! Your vine will never bear healthy fruit until you do right by Aunt Viv!)

    Seriously though, if Scientology becomes the new de facto religion for turning black celebrities crazy, what will that mean for the Jehovah's Witnesses?

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      Sparkle_MotionCaity Weaver
      5/28/13 3:07pm

      Like for Best Actor Oscars. Almost 90 percent of the time, it’s mental illness and historical figures, right?

      So how come Jaden didn't win for his turn in the Karate Kid remake?

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        Johnny ChundersSparkle_Motion
        5/28/13 3:11pm

        Because The Karate Kid was a documentary?

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        Sparkle_MotionJohnny Chunders
        5/28/13 3:15pm

        Ex. Act. Ly.

        And also because the woman who played Elizabeth Shue in that movie turned out to be a woman named Elizabeth Shue, and she went on to have a full career playing Elizabeth Shue.

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      Montauk MonsterCaity Weaver
      5/28/13 3:31pm

      Students of Weird Al, I see.

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        Sean BrodyCaity Weaver
        5/28/13 3:08pm

        Patterns, boom.

        That made me snort.

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          esalocanegraSean Brody
          5/28/13 3:48pm

          I am afraid that may become my new saying. I am preparing myself for an eventual oops-upside-the head and/or multiple knuckle-punches to the arm, probably my right one.

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        GregSamsaCaity Weaver
        5/28/13 3:49pm

        Will, man, it's all about the flow.

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          hilikusopusCaity Weaver
          5/30/13 4:34pm

          I kind of want an explicit Best Portrayal of Mentally Ill/Historical Figure Oscar now.

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