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    Zelda PinwheelAnna Breslaw
    5/22/13 9:54am

    See, what I hear from that Brad Pitt bit is, "I've been an actor since forever, but I don't want to do my job any more." The idea is to portray a role and tell a story, but this guy now feels above portraying a really normal part of lots of stories. He needs to get a new job.

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      Slay BelleZelda Pinwheel
      5/22/13 10:12am

      Uh, no. He's just choosing parts that don't include those scenes. He's not obligated to film sex scenes — he's not a porn star. Actors make these kinds of decisions every day.

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      Bears for PresidentZelda Pinwheel
      5/22/13 10:35am

      I don't know if I feel that way exactly but when I hear something like this I don't think "OMG he must love her so much" but more like "I'd think a mature actor could separate their professional and private lives better than that."

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    DuchessOfDorkAnna Breslaw
    5/22/13 9:25am

    I never found Pitt all that attractive. That being said, I think he's an okay actor. I just never got into the "AMGBRADPITT" love. Same with Leo. I get WHY women find them attractive, but they're just to normal-looking for me. I need a beard or a big nose or giant orc muscles or something.

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      Upper-MiddlebrowDuchessOfDork
      5/22/13 9:36am

      I am with you. Leonardo DiCaprio looks like a greasy bowling alley attendant and I've never, not for one second, found him believable in a role.

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      yoknapatawphacoDuchessOfDork
      5/22/13 9:45am

      I think that variable (for me) is needing a face with some character, like the aforementioned big nose. Both of those two are, like, too symmetrical for me, I guess?

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    Dodai StewartAnna Breslaw
    5/22/13 9:28am
    GIF
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      LaComtesseDodai Stewart
      5/22/13 11:03am
      GIF
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      BlondeGoddessDodai Stewart
      5/22/13 11:06am

      Glorious

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    Chicka_BoomAnna Breslaw
    5/22/13 9:56am

    Can.. can we talk about the pearl in the urethra thing for a second, please? I'm too scared to google it at work.

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      kiisseliChicka_Boom
      5/22/13 11:11am

      I know that pearls are hella delicate. If it was just pushed up into his urethra, it would definitely have dissolved by now.

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      ElenaFisher2.0Chicka_Boom
      5/22/13 12:11pm

      Right? I read that and was like

      GIF
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    seatartAnna Breslaw
    5/22/13 9:47am

    Baby showers aren't usually hosted by the family of the mom to be. It's definitely an etiquette faux pax. But these are the kartrashians so I doubt the rules apply to them.

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      ValeriesDancingMuppetsseatart
      5/22/13 11:37am

      Who is it supposed to be hosted by?

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      Joanbeamseatart
      5/22/13 11:41am

      Something tells me that bit of baby shower etiquette has fallen by the wayside in recent times (though it's hard to pinpoint when). Oddly enough, by comparison, it still very much applies w/r/t bridal showers: it's a big no-no for family members (including future mother-in-laws) to assume hostessing duties.

      P.S. Didn't mean to throw a monkey wrench into things as I'm not a fan of the Kardashians either. They're graspers, through and through!

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    Imperator FuriosaAnna Breslaw
    5/22/13 9:51am

    The more adamant January Jones is, the more I like her. Fuck off, shitty NYT writer. Jones' refusal to give you a warm smile, or dithery banter, or the name of her child's father doesn't make her an alien bitch ice princess.

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      Esmerelda FoofypantsImperator Furiosa
      5/22/13 11:31am

      But I LIKE her for being an alien bitch ice princess. That's all kinds of badass.

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      Imperator FuriosaEsmerelda Foofypants
      5/22/13 11:41am

      But of course! I genuinely like January Jones, as an actress and from what little I've seen of her real-life persona (basically, that one time on the Daily Show and now this dumbass NYT profile) and I think she's a badass. I just hate that she's automatically labeled "ice queen" and "bitch" for acting like a normal person, regardless of whether or not those labels can be awesome in their own way (which they can).

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    JadieJinxieAnna Breslaw
    5/22/13 9:22am

    I can't pinpoint when my disliking of Will Smith came about. Objectively, I know it's weird. I used to LOVE Fresh Prince, can rap along to summer time like the best of them, wanted his babies after the 1st Men in Black, but something changed...anyone else?

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      Lucky FrogJadieJinxie
      5/22/13 9:32am

      I think Wild Wild West had something to do with it.

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      Bascelicna2JadieJinxie
      5/22/13 9:44am

      I find that I can't quite pinpoint it either but I am feeling the weird, insincere, pretentious, Scientology-flavoured vibe he's giving off, and I find that I don't need an explanation. My aversion is explanation enough.

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    Dodai StewartAnna Breslaw
    5/22/13 9:18am

    Thelma and Louise motel fuck for the win. Second place: Fight Club.

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      Oi!Dodai Stewart
      5/22/13 9:30am

      But I mean, can anything really beat Helena's delivery of, "I haven't been f***ed like that since grade school"?

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    SchweepsAnna Breslaw
    5/22/13 9:24am

    I feel like Brad Pitt has remarkably tiny, cute little ears.

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      TremulousCadenceSlowSchweeps
      5/22/13 10:29am

      I also have remarkably tiny ears! Like, people actually remark on how tiny they are. I feel like it's a sign from the universe that Brad and I should make beautiful, tiny-eared babies together.

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      euterpe35Schweeps
      5/22/13 10:40am

      In my opinion, cute and small ears are one of the hallmarks of really ridiculously good looking people. One of my inner horrible things I think of myself is that because I have large, not-cute ears I am therefore an ogre, and not loveable. #sadtrombone

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    StopItISayAnna Breslaw
    5/22/13 9:46am

    Woah, woah, woah. Hold on a second. Is he saying he was a total burnout at the end of his marriage, or is the reader supposed to put two and two together based on the "ten years ago" thing? Either way, at the end there Jennifer Anniston was married to a drugged out cheater? Like, I don't want to start with the whole Poor Jen thing, but seriously? POOR JEN.

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      icicleicicleStopItISay
      5/22/13 9:59am

      Not knocking her, but its fairly common knowledge that Jennifer Aniston is a MEGA pothead. Like smokes pot all day pothead.

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      StopItISayicicleicicle
      5/22/13 10:19am

      SHUT UP! Where have I been?

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