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    cynic322Hudson Hongo
    8/11/16 8:28pm

    This right here is all anyone (evangelical, especially, but anyone really) needs to know to understand just how much Trump is NOT religious, and sure as shit ignorant of the core tenets of evangelical Christianity. I was raised in evangelical churches, I attend one now, and I would humbly submit that I try to live my life in accordance with my professed faith. That faith very fundamentally says you do not go to heaven based on your good acts, you go to heaven because you have accepted Jesus as your savior. Otherwise you are doomed from before you were born, no matter how many kittens you save and abortions you prevent. That he would say this to evangelicals, even half-jokingly, is stunning in its rank ignorance of THE one essential tenet of the faith. More depressing is that this probably played well to that crowd. Once again demonstrating that thinking you are a Christian does not mean you are in fact in any way actually well-versed in your own professed faith. ‘MERICA.

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      Zabellacynic322
      8/11/16 8:50pm

      That he would say this to evangelicals, even half-jokingly, is stunning in its rank ignorance of THE one essential tenet of the faith.

      Donald “Two Corinthians” Trump is ignorant of evangelical Christianity? You don’t say.

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      pygmypossumcynic322
      8/11/16 8:56pm

      I cannot star this enough.

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    sǝuןq ɥɔsʇıʞHudson Hongo
    8/11/16 7:37pm

    What in the fuckity fuck is wrong with his lips in that picture? Holy shit.

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      Suffersfoolsgladlysǝuןq ɥɔsʇıʞ
      8/11/16 7:39pm

      Shhh, that’s his Holy-face.

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      Denver is too damn highsǝuןq ɥɔsʇıʞ
      8/11/16 7:41pm

      he’s sucking out that man’s soul

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    ratchedHudson Hongo
    8/11/16 7:39pm

    Oh for fuck’s sake. He’s going to ruin E-fucking-ternity for people?

    I’m going where gold melts. He can have heaven.

    (Caveat: I don’t believe in either, but I’m going to hedge my bets now.)

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      gramercypoliceratched
      8/11/16 7:50pm

      No, Peter Thiel is trying to ruin eternity. Trump’s just trying to get money out of some rubes. In fairness, it's very easy to mix the two of them up.

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      Ed Spockratched
      8/11/16 7:52pm

      “You think I like being associated with Donald Trump?”

      -Satan

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    SktroopHudson Hongo
    8/11/16 7:38pm

    As usual, everything is about himself. “Help me win so I don’t go to hell”

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      Endless Supply of CynicismSktroop
      8/11/16 7:40pm

      Could be worse. He could be using the church’s tactic of ‘if you don’t give us money you will go hell”

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      puncha yo bunsSktroop
      8/11/16 7:44pm

      I don’t know why he’s concerned, that fate was wrapped long ago. Satan is literally waiting alone at a long-ass, barren mahogany table right now with one empty chair to his right and a couple of PBRs to tell Trump, “You done good, kid.”

      They will be drinking their beer through straws.

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    gramercypoliceHudson Hongo
    8/11/16 7:45pm

    Asking the same evangelicals who never trusted Mitt Romney’s Mormonism to help him in Utah is really funny.

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      gramercypolicegramercypolice
      8/11/16 7:50pm

      Also....

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      Kyuzogramercypolice
      8/11/16 7:54pm

      There are literally infinite other places to be. On a Thursday.

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    ArmchairSophistHudson Hongo
    8/11/16 7:38pm

    “I AM YOUR GOD NOW!” - Trump, trying to appeal to conflicted evangelicals

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      puncha yo bunsArmchairSophist
      8/11/16 7:41pm

      and once I get in, I’ll do my thing that I do very well

      What the hell is that “thing?” Do we even wanna know?

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      Meowwisseypuncha yo buns
      8/11/16 7:44pm

      That “thing” is perpetuating dumb, racist lies and fear mongering.

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    Kenhe LoginHudson Hongo
    8/11/16 7:46pm

    A Venn Diagram of values in the bible and the values of evangelical voters is a null set.

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      TheBurnersMyDestinationKenhe Login
      8/11/16 8:57pm

      That entire crowd in the header photo makes me want to check and see if my wallet is missing. I wouldn’t trust any one of them.

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      EasthaliamarantzKenhe Login
      8/11/16 9:14pm

      “Again I tell you, it is easier for a camel to go through the eye of a needle than for a rich man to enter the kingdom of God.”

      -Jesus

      Seriously, do all the evangelicals who think the Bible is the literal word of God just think Jesus was talking out of his ass here? I would guess if pressed, literally less than 1% of them actually agree with this.

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    Bear BrianHudson Hongo
    8/11/16 10:03pm

    We need a caption contest for Melania in the background of that photo.

    “Don’t touch him, you will burst into flames!!!”

    Or, you know, something much better.

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      NobisBear Brian
      8/11/16 10:29pm

      “Protestants are so fucking weird”?

      (Slovenian, so she’s RC, right?)

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      Bear BrianNobis
      8/11/16 10:30pm

      She's whatever he tells her to be, of that I am certain.

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    Mr.Spaghetti! The Gentildouche YearsHudson Hongo
    8/11/16 7:41pm

    Despite being a notorious womanizer who has made his own name synonymous with greed and excess...

    http://www.npr.org/2016/08/03/488…

    This is a link on Donald Trump being influenced by Norman Vincent Peale, and “prosperity theology”, which may be getting closer to our real American religious inclinations.

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      NYNYNYjrMr.Spaghetti! The Gentildouche Years
      8/11/16 9:20pm

      I wish Jesus had been more clear about his thoughts on wealth and equality...

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      cgo2370Mr.Spaghetti! The Gentildouche Years
      8/11/16 9:49pm

      Ugh, that entire prosperity gospel bullshit just repels me on a fundamental level.

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    Denver is too damn highHudson Hongo
    8/11/16 7:42pm

    Counterpoint:

    Send trump to hell.

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      Quasar FunkDenver is too damn high
      8/11/16 8:04pm

      Well, he does look like Arseface...

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      nice_marmotDenver is too damn high
      8/11/16 8:25pm

      Clearly you mean that in the metaphorical, utilize-substantial-and-formidable-lobbying-machinery sense, not in a literal send-Trump-to-hell sense.

      There can be no other interpretation.

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