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    JustActSurprisedBrendan O'Connor
    8/08/16 2:28pm

    The modern Olympics drape themselves in this early 20th century finery but at bottom they are, like everything else in this godforsaken global hellscape, a corporatist ruse designed to extract capital from suckers who think where they happen to have been born holds any meaning or significance.

    I don’t know, the images of people from different cultures playing together rather than hating one another; the open competition, admiration, and story of LGBTQ athletes that have been ignored giving hope to people across the world; the fact that women can now openly compete which - in case you hadn’t thought about (lol it’s Brendan so of course his upper middle class white privileged assessment hasn’t) isn’t necessarily the case across the globe.

    But nah, someone pissed in your cheerios and so the Olympics is evil. Granted, obviously wasteful for most countries that choose to host, but the games themselves? Something that can actually inspire people to achieve and succeed while providing a platform to demonstrate that we can compete and coexist peacefully.

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      Emerald D.V.JustActSurprised
      8/08/16 2:30pm

      lol

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      Sobchak SecurityJustActSurprised
      8/08/16 2:34pm

      … nm. i didn’t read your last bit.

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    MizJenkinsBrendan O'Connor
    8/08/16 2:30pm

    This is nonsense. How is seeing who can run the fastest not a sport? It’s the original sport.

    I’d be all for chucking the sports that have a professional counterpart so that we can spend more time on the rest. I’d also totally be down with establishing a permanent Olympic Village somewhere so that we can stop abusing local economies/infrastructure every 4 years.

    But the Olympics represent the best of angels of our tribalistic nature. Also the best, most perfect bodies that nature and human endeavor have ever created. Why, without the Olympics we never would have known about that hottie from Tonga and then where would we be???

    GIF

    Not to mention it accounts for about 50% of the average American’s knowledge of geography. So.

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      SleazycheeksMizJenkins
      8/08/16 3:39pm

      Agree with all of this, but I want to point out that the numerous swim races are pretty silly. Freestyle I get. The other ones - why? It’s like having a 100m sprint, a 100m walk, a 100m hop, a 100m potato sack race, etc.

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      HighLikeAnEagleSleazycheeks
      8/08/16 3:43pm

      Hey, if they did a 400m backwards race, I’d tune in every time.

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    Emerald D.V.Brendan O'Connor
    8/08/16 2:24pm

    I rate this 0.75 Hamilton Nolans.

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      Cam/ronEmerald D.V.
      8/08/16 2:39pm

      I’m still waiting for HamNo’s sequel to his epic “Fuck Boston” rant of ‘13.

      http://gawker.com/fuck-boston-14…

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      jimthebritEmerald D.V.
      8/08/16 2:39pm

      Bravo sir, bravo!

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    Dave Brendan O'Connor
    8/08/16 2:21pm

    I am in favor of this. It’s bad enough going to a bar during Real Sports Seasons, but to have someone cheering for a skinny Romanian twirling a ribbon on a stick? What are you trying to prove?


    Don’t get me started on the World Cup.

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      Hello_Madam_PresidentDave
      8/08/16 2:27pm

      The World Cup, in my opinion, is weird because people who literally, literally have never spoken a word about soccer to me are suddenly batshit insane about it.

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      VeroniqueHello_Madam_President
      8/08/16 2:35pm

      This so many times over. I find these are typically the people that know nothing about the rules and freak out over the stupidest stuff.

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    pre-emptive sighBrendan O'Connor
    8/08/16 2:19pm

    IMO dodgeball should be an Olympic sport and that way Brendan O’Connor could be picked last again.

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      MizJenkinspre-emptive sigh
      8/08/16 2:31pm
      GIF
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    FelixElixBrendan O'Connor
    8/08/16 2:22pm

    LESLIE JONES WILL HUNT YOU DOWN O’CONNOR

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      GELLA - LLAPFelixElix
      8/08/16 2:26pm

      Can we have Leslie Jones write for last few weeks of Gawker.

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      DashleyinCaliFelixElix
      8/08/16 2:33pm
      GIF
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    ThatGuy524Brendan O'Connor
    8/08/16 2:35pm

    Sorry but the opening weekend was fucking awesome! The street racing was amazing. The level of tennis has been better than anything at the opens so far. Swimmers are breaking world records. Best Olympic games ever so far, can’t stop watching it. Shit the women’s rugby was even fun.

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      altheman0767ThatGuy524
      8/08/16 2:44pm

      the womens rugby is the real deal

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      BrwnskngurlThatGuy524
      8/08/16 3:11pm

      I agree. Not to mention just watching flawless bodies get it done, it really impressive. Makes me want to hit the gym a little longer.... But then, I’d miss cocktail hour, so....

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    icreateburnerswhenkinjabreaksBrendan O'Connor
    8/08/16 2:46pm

    Look I get that you’re trolling - but it is in fact, the very stupidity of the Olympics that makes them so awesome.

    They represent sports at its most distilled: an utterly arbitrary rooting interest in a game that you almost certainly understand less well than you think you do.

    Right now I’m watching water polo. I know nothing about water polo, but within minutes of turning it on I was screaming instructions to guys who’ve been playing since they were in diapers. And there is never any difficult choice about who to root for. If I wanted to follow Premier League I’d have to choose which team to root for. In the Olympics it’s just the red white and blue every time. The Olympics are fun as hell and despite the disgusting corruption of the IOC I will never stop loving them.

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      Just another Gawkfugeeicreateburnerswhenkinjabreaks
      8/08/16 3:06pm

      I’m with you, for the most part. I just spent 30 minutes watching archery. (Spoiler: The American lost.) and it was fascinating.

      As for rooting interest, the problem is there are like a hundred other nations competing so not every heat of every event has an American in it.

      So for any competition without an American, I root for the English speaking team. So Canada/Britain/Australia, basically.

      If there are no English speaking athletes, I’ll root for the Western Hemisphere.

      If both competing nations are in the same hemisphere, I’ll take Europe over Africa and Africa over Asia, or the South/Central American athletes whose home nation is the farthest north.

      If both Eastern Hemisphere nations are on the same continent, I’ll flip a coin.

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      EvenBaggierTrousers5icreateburnerswhenkinjabreaks
      8/08/16 3:09pm

      Look I get that you’re trolling - but it is in fact, the very stupidity of the Olympics that makes them so awesome.

      Exactly. I never watch Olympic basketball or tennis or many times even soccer because you can see that shit all the time. But some fucking BB gun shooting? Dual diving shit? Archery? Yeah, I’ll watch that stuff because how often do you get to see that on television? Hell, I watched dressage far longer than I thought I ever would. And even better are the experts for each sport who know this is the only time they’ll ever be on television in the next four years for any reason. I mean, where do they keep Rowdy Gaines in non-Olympic years?

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    HypnoCatBrendan O'Connor
    8/08/16 2:26pm

    No. Track? Wow—running around an oval. Looks like they’re going pretty fast!

    Can’t you say the same thing about Indy 500? Or NASCAR?

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      pH unbalancedHypnoCat
      8/08/16 2:46pm

      I can and do.

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      HypnoCatpH unbalanced
      8/08/16 2:55pm

      Me too. In a thousand years I will never understand why people watch that or find it entertaining. I’d literally rather watch my fingernails grow.

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    Flying Squid (I hate me more than you do.)Brendan O'Connor
    8/08/16 2:17pm

    Judgy.

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      Sobchak SecurityFlying Squid (I hate me more than you do.)
      8/08/16 2:19pm

      Look lady, I don’t come down to where you work and slap the dick out of your mouth, now do I? Cut the blogger some slack. He’s having a rough day.

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      jimthebritFlying Squid (I hate me more than you do.)
      8/08/16 2:20pm

      Wankery too

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