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    Quasar FunkHamilton Nolan
    8/01/16 8:52am

    I’ve never read anything by Franzen, are his books as douchey as he looks? And why does looking at his face make me feel bad about liking Ben Folds?

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      Magic Mike PiazzaQuasar Funk
      8/01/16 8:57am

      His writing style strikes a commercially effective balance between quasi-profound tone and content and excessive length to back it up, with the effect of tricking people into thinking they’re reading actual good literature. In reality, he sucks.

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      BJNQuasar Funk
      8/01/16 8:57am

      I actually think his books are better sans context of the man. They're longish explorations of the kind of banal struggles of upper middle class white people which is a perfectly valid thing to write a book about, especially when there's some self awareness baked in. It's only when you wander outside and realize that they were supposed to be THE. GREAT. AMERICAN. NOVELS. that it gets douchey

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    Brendan O'ConnorHamilton Nolan
    8/01/16 9:30am

    I’ve read this “article” a couple of times now, and I am still not sure if it’s a joke, but I have to assume so.

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      Emerald D.V.Brendan O'Connor
      8/01/16 10:01am

      I feel the same way about Jonathan Franzen's existence.

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      TakahashiBrendan O'Connor
      8/01/16 10:17am

      I’d always assumed a “writer” like Franzen was a joke created by the Atlantic or The New Yorker. I’m still waiting for the NYT to jump out and tell us that an overrated white guy who thinks length=high quality work is really a joke on us all.

      Like Nirvana’s In Bloom.

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    BlastProcessingHamilton Nolan
    8/01/16 8:51am

    This guy’s definitely a tool, but at least he’s admitting he is white bread and so has no place writing about race.

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      ThatFatScatCat fucking loves muddy puddlesBlastProcessing
      8/01/16 9:20am

      That was my thought. Better admitting to knowing your place than being another out of touch white person writing books about racial issues.

      ETA: Of course, he could always write a book about how his extreme whiteness has separated him from the black community. That could be an interesting, if not controversial, perspective.

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      Emerald D.V.BlastProcessing
      8/01/16 10:01am

      He's already writing about race. The white race.

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    butchrebelHamilton Nolan
    8/01/16 9:51am

    Dear Jonathan,

    White people have a race, too.

    Write about that.

    Signed,

    A black person.

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      Kony Tornheiserbutchrebel
      8/01/16 10:36am

      His writing is almost exclusively about a certain type of whiteness, though, and that seems to be one of the primary reasons that Gawker media hates him, and everyone pretends he’s an awful writer.

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      IwasintheKrauseWhentheKrauseBurnedDownKony Tornheiser
      8/01/16 10:51am

      That, and he’s an awful writer.

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    Flying Squid (I hate me more than you do.)Hamilton Nolan
    8/01/16 8:52am

    I have never been in love with a black woman.

    Someone didn’t watch Michelle Obama’s speech last week...

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      Alaska FrambopolousFlying Squid (I hate me more than you do.)
      8/01/16 9:02am

      Now THAT is something we can agree upon :) She looked amazing, esp her hair.

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      IwasintheKrauseWhentheKrauseBurnedDownFlying Squid (I hate me more than you do.)
      8/01/16 12:49pm

      In my dreams she’s Secretary of State.

      And there’s an international tent-pitching crisis that requires immediate diplomatic relations.

      In my pants.

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    IAMBlastedBiggsLostBurnerHamilton Nolan
    8/01/16 8:55am

    Franzen's decision tree regarding subjects to write about seems awfully specific, and poorly aimed.

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      NoSkellingtonsIAMBlastedBiggsLostBurner
      8/01/16 9:11am

      He writes about upper middle class white people, admits it’s all he knows in an interview, and you think that his aim is poor? I’d say he’s a marksman.

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      IAMBlastedBiggsLostBurnerNoSkellingtons
      8/01/16 9:18am

      It's his 'I've never been in love with' qualifier that simply doesn't work. But then again, somebody so pathologically self-absorbed would, I guess, have to have some sort of intimate personal experience with a subject to even try to broach the subject. Again, just in my opinion, that's a poorly-aimed effort.

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    festivusaziliHamilton Nolan
    8/01/16 9:08am

    Franzen only writes what he knows: old men awkwardly and desperately trying to fuck young women.

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      Rowen (Paid Politcal Shill)festivusazili
      8/01/16 9:47am

      I thought we had covered that with Woody Allen’s movies and the vast majority of shit aimed at straight people in general.

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      festivusaziliRowen (Paid Politcal Shill)
      8/01/16 9:54am

      It’s a never ending fount of inspiration.

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    ajliennnnHamilton Nolan
    8/01/16 8:55am

    He means he has no black friends, and he’d like to use this opportunity to frame his disinterest in black things as thoughtfulness.

    But if you really want to talk about race, you can talk about whiteness. I encourage more white people to examine that.

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      Kony Tornheiserajliennnn
      8/01/16 9:31am

      Franzen writes almost exclusively about a particular type of whiteness, actually, and that seems to be one of the main reasons Gawker media has all decided he’a awful.

      Sounds like he can’t win.

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      S. LandryKony Tornheiser
      8/01/16 9:53am

      How is Gawker responsible for his own words?

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    YttriumHamilton Nolan
    8/01/16 12:14pm

    Can we please not with “race” anymore. We are all one species, essentially genetically identical, we are the same race. If you want to be racist, be racist towards cilantro (because that horrid substance deserves it) or another form of life on this planets that is not genetically similar to us Humans. Racists contradict themselves in that in being one, they hate themselves (that is a debatable reality).

    By contenting to use the term “race” to define the cultural and locational heritages of members of society we are creating the barriers and walls that say ‘you are different from me” People are only differentiated by where they grew up and the culture they grew up in.

    Physical features allows us to gain an insight into the individual ancestral background. Talking to the individual allows us to gain further insight into their ancestral background and their culture. Humanity has now reached a point where there is so much movement that all the lines and geographical locations that once separated us and allowed us to more readily determine ones point of origin have blurred.

    I know i am in the few, but I am one that firmly believes if we want to truly start to heal and move past that which has plagued our species for so long when it comes to “race” that we as a species need to stop using the word “race” to push us apart from each other.

    *end rant

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      notaquarterbackYttrium
      8/01/16 3:43pm

      Welp, you solved racism with a kinja post. Congrats!

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    Desi_RelafordHamilton Nolan
    8/01/16 8:54am

    You ever hear this Wilco song. It’s not very well known. But it has always been one of my favorites:

    Pot Kettle Black

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