Discussion
  • Read More
    SpringSprungJordan Sargent
    7/29/16 12:18pm

    Still a better Canadian than Ted.

    Reply
    <
    • Read More
      KyuzoSpringSprung
      7/29/16 12:22pm

      I still don’t understand why there wasn’t a real Birther movement against Cruz. HE’S TOTALLY NOT A NATURAL-BORN CITIZEN.

      Reply
      <
    • Read More
      Salt KnightSpringSprung
      7/29/16 12:23pm

      Marginally, at least Bieber isn’t running for political office.

      Reply
      <
  • Read More
    CryptidJordan Sargent
    7/29/16 12:26pm

    That pose is god’s gift to photoshop.

    Reply
    <
    • Read More
      Sobchak SecurityCryptid
      7/29/16 12:27pm

      Wow. God is SUPER gay.

      Reply
      <
    • Read More
      CryptidSobchak Security
      7/29/16 12:40pm

      He moves in mysterious ways.

      Reply
      <
  • Read More
    cuntybawsJordan Sargent
    7/29/16 12:12pm

    Shoulda sent his tiny monkey in his stead. It could have compared minuscule paws with Trump, and thrown feces.

    Reply
    <
    • Read More
      Quintcuntybaws
      7/29/16 12:13pm

      Seems terribly unfair to the monkey.

      Reply
      <
    • Read More
      MichaelJordan'sHitlerMustachecuntybaws
      7/29/16 12:18pm

      They had already booked a tiny-handed orangutan.

      Reply
      <
  • Read More
    The Dread & Fear of KingsJordan Sargent
    7/29/16 12:21pm

    When asked why in hell the RNC would consider giving possibly the world’s most despised and ridiculed person, who also happens to be Canadian, such a visible platform at their convention, Chairman Priebus responded, “because he came in 2nd place in our primary and he’s still a member of our party, after all.”

    Reply
    <
    • Read More
      kickinthedoorThe Dread & Fear of Kings
      7/29/16 2:27pm

      That’s a wonderfully constructed sentence that pays off at the end. +1

      Reply
      <
    • Read More
      MontoviroThe Dread & Fear of Kings
      7/29/16 3:15pm

      The very definition of “roadmap.”

      Reply
      <
  • Read More
    The Shape of Punk to ComeJordan Sargent
    7/29/16 12:17pm

    Pictured practicing his blowjob etiquette, notice how Beiber commands the shaft while still gently cupping the balls.

    Reply
    <
    • Read More
      DoobyOneThe Shape of Punk to Come
      7/29/16 12:21pm

      Reply
      <
    • Read More
      Sparky PolastryThe Shape of Punk to Come
      7/29/16 12:32pm

      It’s cold in the basement!

      Reply
      <
  • Read More
    Mac SpainJordan Sargent
    7/29/16 12:32pm

    He should have. Separating fools from their money is a noble deed. Bieber, again, has failed us all.

    Reply
    <
    • Read More
      dothedewMac Spain
      7/29/16 12:56pm

      .

      Reply
      <
  • Read More
    dothedewJordan Sargent
    7/29/16 2:11pm

    In other news, Justin Bieber is so rich that he could refuse to play a 45 minute show for $5 million because the audience was going to be full of assholes (given that logic, he would never play another Justin Bieber show, the Symphony would never go on, etc.). Not even for charity. What a fucking world, smdh

    Reply
    <
    • Read More
      Marasaidothedew
      7/29/16 10:52pm

      Doubly odd considering that he’s a christina fundamentalist just like them. Maybe he’s burned that ted dind’t win?

      Reply
      <
    • Read More
      dothedewMarasai
      7/30/16 11:02am

      Not to engage in a No True Scotsman type fallacy, but seems to me Bieber lost the right to call himself a fundamentalist when he started breaking basically every biblical commandment in public.

      Reply
      <
  • Read More
    DisMyBurnerBaeJordan Sargent
    7/29/16 1:22pm

    everything happens for a reason

    Wrong vertical Jordan, that’s the answer professional athletes give over on the Deadspin recaps.

    Reason = X and X usually = horny dicks.

    Reply
    <
    • Read More
      GeekthologyDisMyBurnerBae
      8/01/16 1:14pm

      So, technically, everything DOES happen for a reason. The only difference is some think it’s God and some think it’s dicks.

      Reply
      <
    • Read More
      DisMyBurnerBaeGeekthology
      8/01/16 2:02pm

      Some “wish” it was god, others know it was dicks. :D Except when “god takes our loved ones” then we just mutter something about mysterious ways.

      Reply
      <
  • Read More
    pre-emptive sighJordan Sargent
    7/29/16 12:16pm

    It’s probably for the best. If Beiber, Trump, and Rove had been in the same city at the same time, the temptation to destroy Cleveland from orbit would’ve been too great.

    Reply
    <
    • Read More
      Alexispre-emptive sigh
      7/29/16 12:23pm

      I fear it wouldve opened the hellmouth that they mention is there in the last episode of Buffy.

      Reply
      <
  • Read More
    CanadianDominicJordan Sargent
    7/29/16 12:17pm

    I don’t really think its fair to ask a 17 year old Canadian what they think of an American hot-potato issue, and hold it to him years later as some sort of scarlet-letter.

    I’m sure everyone said stupid things when they were 17.

    Reply
    <
    • Read More
      The Shape of Punk to ComeCanadianDominic
      7/29/16 12:20pm

      Um… Excuse me? His fuckboy opinions about rape are okay because he’s Canadian?

      Even when I was an idiot teenager, I didn’t think a women’s choice to abort an fetus was “like killing a baby.” Get bent dickhole.

      Reply
      <
    • Read More
      don't be stupidThe Shape of Punk to Come
      7/29/16 12:36pm

      When I was that age, I was ‘pro-life’ as fuck. Really militant about it. Fast forward a few year (and then even more) I could not possibly be any more pro-choice. Abortions for all, anytime.

      Holding a teen’s words against them is insane, let alone one that was raised Christian and lives in a bubble. Glad you got it then, I guess that makes you a special snow flake. Instead of alienating people because they’re not perfect enough, how about you do what you can to educate and welcome others.

      Reply
      <