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    Cam/ronJordan Sargent
    6/01/16 6:02pm

    That’s what astonishes me about so many venture capitalists - despite their high education and years of experience, they still fall for Visionaries who claim the Revolution is just around the corner if they simply write a few checks.

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      DCboiCam/ron
      6/01/16 6:08pm

      Because they write a ton of checks and the whole thing is based on the idea that you take a flier on 20 companies with the hope that one crushes it? It isn’t hard to understand.

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      Cam/ronDCboi
      6/01/16 6:10pm

      Or perhaps they can carefully do their homework on startups before throwing bags of money at them.

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    GinAndTonic Got Stuck in the BarneyJordan Sargent
    6/01/16 6:04pm

    Her Jobs shirt and forced dude-posturing in every single picture crack me up. Nice power pose, dirtbag!

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      Mr.Spaghetti! The Gentildouche YearsGinAndTonic Got Stuck in the Barney
      6/01/16 6:25pm

      Someone else above made the same point regarding her voice, and attempts to masculinize it.

      It’s a little awkward to watch. It reminds me little bit of Tom Cruise’s acting style. Compensatory.

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      Armageddon T. ThunderbirdMr.Spaghetti! The Gentildouche Years
      6/01/16 6:36pm
      GIF

      “I’m totally attracted to a woman. I’m overjoyed about placing my penis in her... person.”

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    DoobyOneJordan Sargent
    6/01/16 6:00pm

    Jesus, her voice is annoying as fuck.

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      TheRealFrying_slothDoobyOne
      6/01/16 6:08pm

      oh my, you are so right...

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      Cam/ronDoobyOne
      6/01/16 6:13pm

      She sounds like a kid attempting to sound “adult.”

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    BrocephalusJordan Sargent
    6/01/16 5:59pm

    What’s sad is that she’ll continue to be insanely rich until the day she dies. Why I chose to be moral and not a total fucking scumbag I will never know.

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      ThisGuyBrocephalus
      6/01/16 6:03pm

      Morality isn’t the only thing holding you back, I have zeros morals and I’m still broke.

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      slovog!Brocephalus
      6/01/16 6:04pm

      So the only thing holding you back from becoming a billionaire are morals? Well okay then.

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    Wayward ApologyJordan Sargent
    6/01/16 6:52pm

    The thing that baffles me most is Theranos likely would have been a viable company. Blood testing as it stands is dominated by just two companies that don’t have consumer friendly operations, a low priced, consumer friendly/oriented blood testing business would probably do fairly well in the market with traditional equipment (i.e. equipment that works), instead they took a good business plan and (allegedly) perpetrated a giant fraud claiming to be using equipment that didn’t work (while also purchasing equipment that everyone else was using to do the actual testing in most cases).

    And I hate needles, I hate getting blood drawn but stick in my vein or prick my finger, I can’t see how one is much more preferable to the other, actually if I was given a choice between the traditional method and a finger prick I’m going with traditional,having my finger pricked actually sounds worse than a relatively painless blood draw.

    It’s basically like Austin Powers, the legitimate side of the business could have been completely successful had they not spent all their time on the fraud.

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      GinAndTonic Got Stuck in the BarneyWayward Apology
      6/01/16 7:02pm

      I wish blood draws were painless.

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      Legbert123Wayward Apology
      6/01/16 7:21pm

      Yeah i hate blood testing too. But the claims she made are crazy. Sad to see the house fall like this but i watched of all things a watch mojo video that was so on point the amount of ex military on the board of directors is something that is nuts. Kissenger for crissakes http://www.watchmojo.com/mobile/id/1565…

      Ya i dont believe you employ that amount of military brass unless you want to shove shit down people throats.

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    Sid and FinancyJordan Sargent
    6/01/16 6:14pm

    You know that feeling when you find a bag of weed you completely forgot you had?

    What I’m saying is that my net worth fluxuates wildly sometimes, too.

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      TheDogIsStillBarkingSid and Financy
      6/01/16 6:27pm

      Sadly, this is more akin to thinking you still had a bag of weed, only to find you already smoked it and forgot. Probably because it was really good weed, which makes it even more tragic.

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      j4x_TheDogIsStillBarking
      6/02/16 8:00am

      or worse, bought really good weed than got high, hid it somewhere clever and NOW YOU CAN”T FIND IT ANYWHERE

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    ╰( ´◔ ω ◔ `)╯< Woke and BokeJordan Sargent
    6/01/16 6:02pm

    It’s math, dude. Just basic, run-of-the-mill math. That’s how they do the valuations.

    NPV=S*x I


    *S=Special Snowflake

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      Cam/ron╰( ´◔ ω ◔ `)╯< Woke and Boke
      6/01/16 6:09pm

      Don’t forget Momentum Points.

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      toothpetard╰( ´◔ ω ◔ `)╯< Woke and Boke
      6/01/16 6:13pm

      Net worth is crap, sure; but what’s her credit rating?

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    pre-emptive sighJordan Sargent
    6/01/16 5:54pm

    I think we just found Donald’s VP choice

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      ShmataHaripre-emptive sigh
      6/01/16 5:59pm

      He does have a thing for women and blood

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    Armageddon T. ThunderbirdJordan Sargent
    6/01/16 6:24pm

    But why doesn’t she just value her brand in the billions? It works for me. My billion dollar brand gives me a net worth of $1,000,000,037.

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      MWarnerMArmageddon T. Thunderbird
      6/01/16 9:41pm

      I wish it was that easy for the little guy. Imagine trying to pull a Trump at like a car dealership or something:

      “Mr. Warner, you have a decent credit score but not enough to qualify for the 0% APR on the Lexus E Class I’m afraid 2% is the best we can do based on your financials.”

      “Oh don’t worry, I’m not a default risk. My credit score doesnt matter because I’m very rich.”

      “You listed $65,000 as your net annual income on the application form.”

      “Yeah but I have assets. My net worth is $10 million when you include those.”

      “You didn’t list a home or any other property here. Just your trade-in car, which our appraiser estimated at about $7500. Do you have anything else you forgot to list? A stock portfolio? Trust fund?”

      “My brand.”

      “Your brand?”

      “Yeah, my personal brand.”

      “I don’t understand.”

      “My personal brand is worth about $9,990,000 according to my most recent estimate. That plus my car, savings account and the furniture in my apartment puts me just over $10 million net worth.”

      “......... Get the fuck out of my office.”

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    BurnerBabyBurnerBabyDiscoInfernoJordan Sargent
    6/01/16 7:04pm

    Can someone explain to me how a 19 year old “drop out” (not saying that in a derogatory way, just that she didnt have much training) was even supposed to have created this kind of company to begin with? No article explains anything. It just says “she was scared of needles so she started a company in secret for 10 years”. Its not like she coded an app or something, thats serious hard science. Was she supposed to have really just started paying scientists and engineers to invent technology for her, based on her vague ideas?

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      RBrianBurnerBabyBurnerBabyDiscoInferno
      6/01/16 7:19pm

      She and Theranos kept it secret while raising almost $800 million in funds. It was never third party tested yet investors threw money at her and Theranos. The WSJ nailed her ass, a Pulitzer is coming their way.

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      XrdsAlumBurnerBabyBurnerBabyDiscoInferno
      6/01/16 7:45pm

      Start with parents who had political connections and family money. Add in the fact that she’s a pretty blonde lady who knows how to present a pitch deck. Before you know it she has an impressive board of directors and lots of letters of introduction to Silicon Valley investors who think the level of due diligence required for a medical device startup is the same as that for a fart app company.

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