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    Masshole JamesSam Biddle
    5/09/16 11:59am

    Maybe I’m sick but this is really getting me hot.

    GIF
    GIF
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      benjaminalloverMasshole James
      5/09/16 12:13pm

      The dive roll over the little pile of jihadists is pretty adorable. We did that move in junior cheerleading.

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      SpongyFrogMasshole James
      5/09/16 12:14pm

      Them, too, considering how overdressed they are for strenuous activities.

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    ManchuCandidateSam Biddle
    5/09/16 11:49am

    Super squats and P90X for freedom!

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      MBCockManchuCandidate
      5/09/16 11:51am

      Yuppie American ISIS is the name of my next band.

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      MattManchuCandidate
      5/09/16 11:56am

      All I can think about now, is some uber-Murican patriot watching this shit on Fox News, getting all incensed, slapping on his sweat bands, dusting off his VHS of Sweating to the Oldies and being like ‘I’ll be damned if I’ll let those jihadists be in better shape than me! It’s ON!’.

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    Sir VivorSam Biddle
    5/09/16 11:58am

    “WE HAVE NO BALLS AND WE’RE HIGH ON SHITTY METH! Fear us please?”

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      TheSwanandPaedoSir Vivor
      5/09/16 12:45pm

      Haha are they really on meth? I guess desert culture is consistent worldwide.

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      Sir VivorTheSwanandPaedo
      5/09/16 1:01pm

      Aye, they use some form of meth in there. I forgot what it’s called but it’s definitely something their religion tells them not to use.

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    Rom RombertsSam Biddle
    5/09/16 11:53am

    the local bdsm club runs similar promotional videos

    $40 annual membership and then you can get kicked in the nexus by a guy wearing a duck costume and a t-shirt that says #1 Dad while you watch home videos of your first communion

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      EatTheCheeseNicholsonRom Romberts
      5/10/16 4:22am

      I once went to a BDSM strip club and saw a guy get tasered in the crotch. I had no idea I was apparently supporting jihad that night...

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    R.S.D.Sam Biddle
    5/09/16 12:19pm

    Meanwhile, they will be killed by an AC-130 gunner who has to run 1.5 miles in under 12 minutes, gets weighed, and cranks out around 50 pushups and situps. If they pass then they’re good for the year.

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      Burners Of SteelR.S.D.
      5/09/16 12:25pm

      Or

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      EldiabloR.S.D.
      5/09/16 12:30pm

      You ever try firing a 30mm Cannon with Cheetos dust covered hands ? It’s no easy task my friend.

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    MattSam Biddle
    5/09/16 12:07pm

    Sami Fanik, a Brooklyn-based trainer, echoed this last sentiment: “I don’t understand why they keep hitting [their] abs with sticks and shit.”

    Maybe they watch too many 70's era kung-fu movies and have mistakenly bought that this somehow accomplishes something?

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      ArturoMatt
      5/09/16 12:48pm

      They’ve watched Bloodsport almost as many times as I have but unlike me they think that’s real training.

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    DisMyBurnerBaeSam Biddle
    5/09/16 1:33pm

    Sam Biddle is just jelly he can’t kick more people in the nuts.

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      suppiluliumasDisMyBurnerBae
      5/09/16 6:05pm
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      SilverPantherIsSilverDisMyBurnerBae
      5/09/16 7:14pm

      THAT’S MY PURSE!

      I DON’T KNOW YEWWW!

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    Sluicer's ghostSam Biddle
    5/09/16 12:04pm

    When was the last time we saw so many people wearing matching sneakers? Hmmm... Jim Jones? Drink the lemonade little jihadis

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      Kenhe LoginSluicer's ghost
      5/09/16 12:33pm

      I think you’re thinking of Heaven’s Gate, so eat the pudding.

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    Tyrant BigglesSam Biddle
    5/09/16 12:34pm

    But do they possess the Jowls of Freedom?

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      Wayward ApologySam Biddle
      5/09/16 11:52am

      I will kick you in the balls for $20, ask about my multi-session discounts!

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