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    benjaminalloverHamilton Nolan
    3/21/16 9:25am

    Virtual reality headsets were available for use by a giggling queue of delegates. The Guardian put one on. In the real world, I was fully clothed in a conference hall. But in the virtual room I could see a glass-walled room with two giant egg-shaped sculptures outside, and a woman crawling on all-fours in front of me. Looking around, I could see other parts of the room: looking down revealed a naked lower half, to which the woman was attending.

    oh my god, British much?

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      EvenBaggierTrousers4benjaminallover
      3/21/16 9:33am

      “As she manually adjusted my lower extremity, I began experiencing a sensation that was at once rather pleasant and yet somewhat halting and precipitous. After but a moments notice, my body released fluids most commonly associated with the series of events leading to procreation...”

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      Cam/ronbenjaminallover
      3/21/16 9:33am

      I hope that performance was serviceable and smashing.

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    StenchofaburnerHamilton Nolan
    3/21/16 9:30am

    Dinorah Hernandez, the content manager for BaDoinkVR, a subscription site which includes virtual reality scenes, says that she soon discovered that users of the site did not want the male actor to make any sounds, or to touch the female actor, the better to preserve the illusion that she is having sex with them.

    “The market is males,” said Hernandez. “We have released scenes from female perspective, and got a bashing because it’s a ‘gay scene’.

    Ah yes, a new medium for the same old perspective. I can only wonder about the imagination of these users for whom the mere thought or fantasy of “male sexual sounds” is off putting.

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      Spence1115Stenchofaburner
      3/21/16 9:44am

      The rest is dumb, but I get the sounds thing. If its VR and its meant to be you, and the guy starts making noises that you’re not making, that would ruin any immersion. POV porn often does the same thing, avoiding the guy making noises because its meant to be you.

      Of course, the fact that someone isn’t actually riding your junk probably breaks it even more so, but removing the sounds of the guy is an easier problem to sound.

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      StenchofaburnerSpence1115
      3/21/16 9:52am

      I don’t know. I’m a woman and seeing a woman (or hearing for that matter) having sex is not gross or disgusting or off putting in any way. On the contrary, I would say it can be very hot (depending on the performer and act, of course).

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    Dave Hamilton Nolan
    3/21/16 9:36am

    Until we have holodecks, VR porn is still just jerking off. If I am going to jerk off, I do not want to do so while wearing a headset. I still have a tiny shred of dignity.

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      EvenBaggierTrousers4Dave
      3/21/16 9:52am

      Besides, unless you’re SURE everyone won’t be back for another three or four hours, it could potentially be really embarrassing to totally immerse yourself like that...

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      fixthefernbackDave
      3/21/16 2:48pm

      Isn’t a holodeck still jerking off unless you’re there with another person? Is fucking a hologram somehow not masturbation?

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    CorbettoHamilton Nolan
    3/21/16 9:37am

    I jerk off the old fashioned way

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      EvenBaggierTrousers4Corbetto
      3/21/16 9:53am

      You use steel wool pads wrapped in a shammy too...? I mean, uh...

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      Sluicer's ghostCorbetto
      3/21/16 10:39am

      What? Warm, raw liver with your ex-girlfriend's panties over your head? Respect!!!!

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    cuntybawsHamilton Nolan
    3/21/16 9:24am

    Users, she said, ‘experience that enough in their real life, but being men, are remarkably adept at convincing themselves otherwise...”

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      suzannesomersthighmastercuntybaws
      3/21/16 9:31am
      GIF
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    Sid and FinancyHamilton Nolan
    3/21/16 9:27am

    That quote applies equally to SXSW attendees in general.

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      GregoireHamilton Nolan
      3/21/16 9:24am

      So essentially you have to be Sasha Grey AND Meryl Streep. You can easily a future where the Academy Awards and the Adult Film Awards merge although that will not help with the Oscars diversity problem.

      In the future we will look upon iconic porn stars as we do Fred Astaire and Ginger Rogers (who fucked backwards and in heels).

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        Cam/ronGregoire
        3/21/16 9:37am

        We’ll soon see CGI-engineering “porn fan fiction.” Sasha soon won’t have shit on Louise Brooks.

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      Low Information BoaterHamilton Nolan
      3/21/16 9:26am

      Anyone who has common sense will remember that the bewilderments of the eyes are of two kinds, and arise from two causes, either from coming out of the light or from going into the light.


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        halftimetweetHamilton Nolan
        3/21/16 9:25am

        The future of sex tapes will be videos of people masturbating with goggles on.

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          GeorgeGeoffersonLivesHamilton Nolan
          3/21/16 9:30am

          lolwut?

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