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Ari Schwartz: Dark Lord of the SnarkJia Tolentino
2/17/16 4:25pm
1. I fucking love Slack and it’s actually incredibly well implemented. Don’t you touch my one functional tool. Confluence sucks, Rally sucks, Trello sucks, everything sucks. But Slack is always there.

DON’T TALK BAD ABOUT MY ONE THING I LIKE.

2. The arrangement where the TP and whatever is taken care of? That’s actually kinda nice, given that most shared living is dorms without the dorm benefits. I don’t get why people think it’s so awful to have menial tasks taken care of for you. There are only two real commodities in the world: time or money. Pay one or the other.

I’ll always pay money if I can help it.
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  Snacky_OnassisAri Schwartz: Dark Lord of the Snark
  2/17/16 4:29pm
  “dorm part duex” is exactly what I was thinking as I was reading it. It’s a starter-starter apartment.
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  Ari Schwartz: Dark Lord of the SnarkSnacky_Onassis
  2/17/16 4:35pm
  TBH, if I hadn’t been in a relationship when I moved away from grad school, I would’ve probably considered a situation like that. Even in my current setup, my wife is consistently too busy for basic upkeep, which is fine, but I’m only JUST less busy enough to handle it. And my hours are less than they used to be.
  
  When I was starting out and working 50-60 hours a week, I didn’t have time to work out because my free time got eaten up by “chores.”
  
  Adulthood sucks.
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mollymlf05Jia Tolentino
2/17/16 4:27pm
I am confused by the concept of Slack. It’s group texting, but within an app, right? So, it’s Whatsapp...but someone felt the need to create a different version of Whatsapp?

Also FUUUUCK paying $2,250 for a room without my own bathroom.
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  Ari Schwartz: Dark Lord of the Snarkmollymlf05
  2/17/16 4:31pm
  No, it’s more like IRC, but it’s a really well-implemented interface and also makes it useful to work with distributed teams.
  
  It’s also stable, allows easy fileshare, and lets you share code easily.
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  mollymlf05Ari Schwartz: Dark Lord of the Snark
  2/17/16 4:33pm
  So it’s Whatsapp and Google Drive in one?
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DonnaDraperJia Tolentino
2/17/16 4:24pm
single bedrooms will rent for $2,250 to $3,190 for a month-to-month lease

What the actual fuck. I’m 26 with a career and I am dying to have my own apartment (currently in a roommate situation) and shit like this just keeps making that harder and harder for people my age. It’s like someone has this idea that millennials never want to grow up and buy houses and get married and stuff—but maybe we would is there weren’t so many god damn barriers to actual fucking adulthood being placed in front of us all the time.

We’re all fucked.

*bangs head into student loan interest statement repeatedly*
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  Ari Schwartz: Dark Lord of the SnarkDonnaDraper
  2/17/16 4:29pm
  If it makes you feel any better, I felt that way at 26.
  
  I feel less that way in my 30s. It does get better. Slowly.
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  Nom de pixelDonnaDraper
  2/17/16 4:30pm
  Seriously. That is way more than I spent on my mortgage. And we got a whole house with a yard. I remember when we were renting, it felt like we could just never get ahead.
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GELLA - LLAPJia Tolentino
2/17/16 4:16pm
MTV is making another Real Life Williamsburg show
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  Jia TolentinoGELLA - LLAP
  2/17/16 4:20pm
  can u imagine how boring a real world set in this apt would be
  
  it would just be people ordering various services on their phones and typing
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  The Noble RenardJia Tolentino
  2/17/16 4:24pm
  “Yo bro, let’s go grab some beers”
  
  “Nah, I just hit up a Chinese place on Grubhub and ordered a bottle of wine off Minibar. Can’t go out tonight. Gotta work on crotcheting my iPhone cover.”
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wafflesfriendsworkJia Tolentino
2/17/16 4:22pm
If I had $2250 to spend on an apartment every month I would live alone so I never have to interact with people
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  Dr. Programmer, Esquirewafflesfriendswork
  2/17/16 4:26pm
  Heck, if I have $600 a month for living expenses, I’d be able to do that where I live :/
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  TampaBeeAtch (misplaced witty subname)wafflesfriendswork
  2/17/16 5:43pm
  I can’t fathom paying that to live with other people and not have my own bathroom. Obviously I don’t live in NYC, but my mortgage including taxes, insurance and insane flood insurance included is WAAAAAAAAAAY less than that. I’m feeling very appreciative of my house right now.
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Sorely VexedJia Tolentino
2/17/16 4:40pm
Excellent. Excellent. I think the world may finally be ready for my new hot-bedding service. I call it “Bedify.”

Here’s how it works: you decide what time you want to sleep and reserve a bed for that time period using our convenient app. When you’re not using the bed, someone else is, which helps defray the costs of fashionable urban living.

Obviously, the popular 11pm-6am slot commands premium pricing, but, for those willing to be flexible, a top bunk in a fairly low-density room from 2pm-9pm runs a very affordable $1,300 (minimum 3 month commitment required).

Kitchen and bathroom facilities are available for a nominal surcharge, subject to availability.

“Bedify: make your bed work for you.”
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  BenjaminSmuttinsSorely Vexed
  2/17/16 5:12pm
  Nice. This is actually sort of a thing in Tokyo. Look up Tokyo Capsule Hotel if you want to be truly horrified.
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  Sorely VexedBenjaminSmuttins
  2/17/16 5:14pm
  I actually spent a couple of nights in a capsule hotel during my student traveling days. They’re a surprisingly economical way to sleep off too much sake.
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titania126Jia Tolentino
2/17/16 4:18pm
The article does stipulate that if you sign a 12-month lease a single bedroom is $1800/month, which is actually not bad for nice bedroom in a brand-new building in an apartment that has free laundry, free wifi, free household items, outdoor space, etc. The $2,250/month rate is for month-to-month, which would cover more wear and tear on the building that comes with more frequent turnover and cover the cost of potentially suddenly having an empty room for some weeks throughout the year.

Although if they take the L train away, god help all these helpless idiots.
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  Puddingandthemissustitania126
  2/17/16 4:27pm
  I can see situations where living like this would be really convenient, especially if you work constantly or do short term assignments.
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  titania126Puddingandthemissus
  2/17/16 4:33pm
  Oh, I mean, totally. I have a larger and more fundamental issue with the rich young techies and bankers of this city who seem to feel that living everywhere should be just as convenient as living in the suburbs, and they should never have to leave their bubble or interact with anyone or eat anything that hasn’t been preapproved by Instagram. But I was just renting out a room in my apartment in the West Village for a short term while waiting for a friend to move in, and the options available to people who are looking for short-term leases or who need furnished housing are few and grim. I heard horror story after horror story about people willing to pay anything just to have somewhere decent to live for a few months while they got settled, or who needed somewhere to live between jobs that keep them on the road who just couldn’t find ANYTHING. AirBnB is not priced to accommodate that, for the most part, so there are certainly people for whom this makes sense. Like most well-meaning ideas that arrive in New York, New Yorkers will either twist this to make it their own or it will die.
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JozeeDozeeJia Tolentino
2/17/16 4:28pm
I feels for y’all in NYC. That shit ain’t right.
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  Nom de pixelJozeeDozee
  2/17/16 4:32pm
  Last time I was job hunting, a company in NY tried to get me to interview there. I was unemployed, but I still wasn't desperate enough for that.
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  vegbrarianJozeeDozee
  2/17/16 4:34pm
  I find the numbers hard to comprehend. Where I live (yay Alberta?) you can rent a HOUSE for about $1500/month, and I still find that to be completely ludicrous.
  
  The rent is too damn high.
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No-Mi SkyeJia Tolentino
2/17/16 5:15pm
I use Slack at work. I kinda love it. Am sure they’re monitoring everything I say. Including this post.

“Hello IT dept!”

That being said, who the hell is going to pay for a single room at those prices? If you’re willing to do that, I have a kitching floor that’s very clean. $500 a month. Hit me up on slack.
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  No-Mi SkyeNo-Mi Skye
  2/17/16 5:46pm
  *kitchen, but you can call it whatever for $600.
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WellWhatHadHappenWasJia Tolentino
2/17/16 4:29pm
$2,250 to $3,190

GIF

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