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    CatdogWhispererSam Biddle
    9/21/15 3:19pm

    Related: the toothless redneck neighbor woman was complaining about money the other day and I said “why don’t you just drink water and stop buying pop.” She looked at me like I was crazy and said she was addicted to Mountain Dew. Addicted. To Mountain Dew. What a boring way to slowly kill yourself.

    I don’t have a point to this story, I just wanted to reaffirm a few of your preconceptions about West Virginia.

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      VtDkDudeCatdogWhisperer
      9/21/15 3:31pm

      Oh, don’t get me started on the shit that poor people put into their bodies! But it is the cycle of poverty at work and not the people’s fault.

      Still I wish that stores at which folks can get to (ie: corner markets) would sell better options and take an active role in trying to get folks to make better choices and changes. Instead they just keep pushing the same crap onto them and taking their money.

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      Classicblanca FilmCatdogWhisperer
      9/21/15 3:39pm

      We know... Sincerely, Pennsylvania.

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    GregoireSam Biddle
    9/21/15 3:11pm

    The real-life embodiment of this:

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      Cam/ronGregoire
      9/21/15 3:19pm

      “I don’t know where you magic pixies came from but I like your Pixie Drink!”

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    Cam/ronSam Biddle
    9/21/15 3:15pm
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      dothedewSam Biddle
      9/21/15 3:16pm

      This is stupid. If these kids want to be x-treme, they should be shooting vodka, not sugar water. When will the kids learn?

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        Pink Skulldothedew
        9/21/15 3:29pm

        This is a very off brand comment for you to make.

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        dothedewPink Skull
        9/21/15 3:30pm

        They are sullying my good name with their amateurish tactics. They look to be around 15 yrs old and if I recall correctly, at 15 vodka is more appropriate than soda.

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      MizJenkinsSam Biddle
      9/21/15 3:23pm

      Ahhhhhhhh memories. Takes me back to the summer of 1994, bonging Hawaiian punch at a church retreat in rural Ohio. Our youth pastor, an ex-hippie, was nonetheless disconcerted at our use of the word “bong” (innocents we were we had no idea what it meant other than chugging something really fast...not even sure who came up with it). For whatever reason our soundtrack to this even was Warren G. and Nate Dog’s “Regulate”.

      To this day if I so much as smell Hawaiian punch I instantly puke from nostalgia.

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        BooBearSmashMizJenkins
        9/21/15 6:39pm

        This is so adorable! ....and wholesome?? I remember going to pasture parties in high school where guys would do keg stands and beer bongs.

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        MizJenkinsBooBearSmash
        9/21/15 6:51pm

        Yeah, my entire high school was pretty preppy and wholesome and on top of it I ran with a whole bunch of nerdy church girls. Our main entertainment was sleepovers and board games. I think the most scandalous thing we did was make orgasm sounds while eating raw cookie dough out of the bowl.

        Wouldn’t trade it for anything.

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      ╰(　´◔　ω　◔ `)╯< Woke and BokeSam Biddle
      9/21/15 3:12pm

      I would say hold off on that shit until college, but let’s be honest, these Cool Teens aren’t going to college.

      Carpe Diem, Cool Teens.

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        Cam/ron╰(　´◔　ω　◔ `)╯< Woke and Boke
        9/21/15 3:16pm

        It’s tragic how so many Cool Teens reach their peak in life at age 17.

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      SpangarangSam Biddle
      9/21/15 3:18pm

      The Post Office is so 90s.

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        EatTheCheeseNicholsonSam Biddle
        9/21/15 3:12pm

        The Dew Boys is the name of my upcoming bluegrass supergroup, dibs.

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          logophobe, desperate dadEatTheCheeseNicholson
          9/21/15 6:13pm

          “Their debut album, Bongin’ At the Post Office, is really sublime”

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        CAPTAINOHSam Biddle
        9/21/15 3:14pm

        Not sure if greatest thing ever or just sad.

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          GrumpyEagleSam Biddle
          9/21/15 3:20pm

          Red-haired kids: always up to no good.

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            VtDkDudeGrumpyEagle
            9/21/15 3:32pm

            At least they aren’t trying to steal other folks souls. Or maybe that is next hence getting all jacked up on the Dew.

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