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    Snacky_OnassisBobby Finger
    8/27/15 9:57am

    Did she come with a gift receipt? Where do you go to return your Kris Jenner?

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      BabyJaneSnacky_Onassis
      8/27/15 9:59am

      I have a feeling she’s a final sale. No returns. No exchanges.

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      memorykid9Snacky_Onassis
      8/27/15 10:02am

      No returns. Would you buy a Kris Jenner from a store that accepted returns?

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    Zelda PinwheelBobby Finger
    8/27/15 9:57am

    I just can’t stop loving Robert Wagner. This scandal makes him look shady as fuck and I still wish every day that I was Jennifer Hart. I’m a bad person :o( This is not a joke—I am disappointed with myself.

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      Cocopop!Zelda Pinwheel
      8/27/15 10:01am

      This scandal will never die. The majority of people reading this probably know him only from the scandal.

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      Zelda PinwheelCocopop!
      8/27/15 10:04am

      Well yeah. His last big acting job was the Austin Powers series. Young people only know him as a face on a rag being (possibly rightly) accused of AT LEAST negligent homicide. In my mind he is a self-made millionaire industrialist doting husband sex machine.

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    andsmokeit is mrs tormund giantsbaneBobby Finger
    8/27/15 9:56am

    wtf are pregnancy lips

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      Zelda Pinwheelandsmokeit is mrs tormund giantsbane
      8/27/15 9:57am

      I think it’s those not-cartoony ones on the pregnant person.

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      andsmokeit is mrs tormund giantsbaneZelda Pinwheel
      8/27/15 9:59am

      so..just regular lips?

      or does she mean vaginal lips?

      idk im not up on the cool lingo

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    liziaBobby Finger
    8/27/15 10:00am

    Skimming over that Natalie Wood link, I don’t see anything to do with Christopher Walken and I’ve never heard anything about this. So uh...what up with that?

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      Bobby Fingerlizia
      8/27/15 10:02am

      They were all together at the time of her drowning.

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      liziaBobby Finger
      8/27/15 10:09am

      O :(

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    RaisedByHeathens Orange Meanie-PantsBobby Finger
    8/27/15 10:00am

    I think it would be kind of neat and weirdly fitting if we found out that Kris was super into existentialism. If she just decided that the world is a meaningless and absurd place and since everything is transitory she can make her own life mean what she wants it to and somebody handed her some Kierkegaard or Sartre and was like “Kris- this is TOTALLY for you” and she just has been riding it out since then.

    (note, this is what I think I remember of existentialism from college philosophy courses)

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      Sita pt.3 *sigh*RaisedByHeathens Orange Meanie-Pants
      8/27/15 10:10am

      Kris Jenner’s existentialism clearly rubbed off on Kim.

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      RaisedByHeathens Orange Meanie-PantsSita pt.3 *sigh*
      8/27/15 10:17am

      I f’n love Kim Kierkegaardashian. Almost as much as Neitzsche Family Circus

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    JozeeDozeeBobby Finger
    8/27/15 10:03am

    I guess you could say Tom and Gisele’s marriage has...deflated.

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      Cylontater: Luke Skywalker's Baby MamaJozeeDozee
      8/27/15 10:08am
      GIF
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      usedtobehereJozeeDozee
      8/27/15 10:08am
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    AnandaNormallyLurksBobby Finger
    8/27/15 9:55am

    A shitty cake delivered by a shitty mom? Meh, I'm betting a lot of people have had birthdays like this

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      randilynAnandaNormallyLurks
      8/27/15 9:58am

      She had CAKE!!!

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      Zelda PinwheelAnandaNormallyLurks
      8/27/15 10:01am

      I see you’ve met my mom.

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    comeonpoppetBobby Finger
    8/27/15 10:00am

    I feel like Jessica Seinfeld only exists during the summer months. I am thankful the air is turning to fall.

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      Lady Hazel of Wassernamecomeonpoppet
      8/27/15 10:05am

      She is a specter that haunts the Hamptons during the warm months and retreats to a Manhattan apartment as soon as one can feel a chill in the breeze.

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      Snacky_OnassisLady Hazel of Wassername
      8/27/15 10:41am

      She is a banshee that visits bad children and hides vegetables in their brownies.

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    Adrastra, patron saint of snarkBobby Finger
    8/27/15 9:58am

    I don’t think I would want to be friends with JLaw’s friends.

    ETA: Also, can we talk about Mariah Carey’s Christmas picture book?

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      ohballsAdrastra, patron saint of snark
      8/27/15 10:01am

      Concur! Jeez louise...

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      AliciaAdrastra, patron saint of snark
      8/27/15 10:42am

      Mariah Carey is so off the wall it is amazing.

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    AnonymousCivilPersonBobby Finger
    8/27/15 9:59am

    She should return it. It is heavily used.

    GIF
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      andsmokeit is mrs tormund giantsbaneAnonymousCivilPerson
      8/27/15 10:00am

      did not realize how much jim varney looked like gollum until right now

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      Brian Schlosserandsmokeit is mrs tormund giantsbane
      8/27/15 10:09am

      We hatessss the hobbitses, Vern!

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