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    Zachary BosDee Barnes
    8/24/15 3:47pm

    Where are all the MRAs coming from? Is there a forum posting telling them to come over?

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      citizendefargeZachary Bos
      8/24/15 4:01pm
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      BuffaloRudeZachary Bos
      8/24/15 4:04pm

      I was kinda wondering the same thing.

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    SkillbillyDee Barnes
    8/24/15 3:35pm

    No silence on domestic violence?

    What about the women who beat the shit out of their men on a regular basis? Don't think it happens? You're delusional.

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      ideasleepfuriouslySkillbilly
      8/24/15 3:37pm

      Feel free to write your own essay on that.

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      Thunder-LipsSkillbilly
      8/24/15 3:39pm

      You just might be a piece of shit. Then again, It does take a brass set to admit you got overpowered by somebody not named Rhonda Rousey.

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    gramercypoliceDee Barnes
    8/24/15 3:59pm

    This is another really good post from Dee. I kind of hope Gawker Media can find an outlet for her to continue writing on a broader set of topics.

    But one thing to note about the headline quote is this: Artists have always used their achievements to mask their personal failings. I’m not equating Dre to Picasso, but artists from Picasso to Miles Davis to Jackson Browne to Madonna have always been fairly awful people at times in their personal lives (and they would all have their defenders among people very close to them, as well). Almost none of them has ever issued any kind of an apology for their personal behavior, and something like Dre’s apology is almost unheard of, even if a lot of reasonable people think it’s inadequate. “Trust the art, not the artist,” is an age-old saying for a reason: the people whose art you admire are frequently shitty people with good, fair, or bad PR representation.

    Dee Barnes has no obligation to accept Dre’s apology at all. And on the flipside, Dre has no obligation to spend the rest of his life apologizing for things he did in the past. They were awful things, and some people aren’t going to forgive him no matter what he says or does. And, frankly, he can’t be worried about what those people think. Just like Gawker can’t change itself just because there are a few commenters who won’t stop posting dumb comments about some story that was posted a month ago or 5 years ago.

    In my experience, a lot of successful artists, athletes, writers, actors, you name it, are mean, insecure, vicious people who can turn on the charm when they need to. I’m not even saying they’re meaner than average, but they are a lot meaner than their public persona would ever indicate. Otoh, I’ve met some very famous people who had reputations for being awful and found them to be smart, thoughtful, welcoming, and nice, if sometimes defensive and guarded.

    What Dre did to Dee Barnes remains an awful thing. What happened to her career after that beating is probably even worse, although she is the judge of that, not me. Even Dre can’t undo the beating. But there are people who could give her her career back, and these recent posts indicate that she deserves a shot at that. It’s unfortunate that her thoughts on that incident and on Dre and the movie are what it took to give her a forum for her writing, but I hope she has a chance to weigh in on other topics and other controversies in the future. I don’t think she’s living in the past, but I do think it would be a loss for everyone if the only time she gets to speak her mind is when she’s asked to comment on that past.

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      MizJenkinsgramercypolice
      8/24/15 4:14pm

      This is a fantastic comment and I agree with your sentiments wholeheartedly.

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      istarigramercypolice
      8/24/15 4:34pm

      I also agree wholeheartedly with this sentiment. I learned long ago to dissociate the person from their art. Wagner, Beethoven, Sinatra, Coltrane... all terrible people and all so brilliant we listen to their stuff anyway.

      That being said, I’m not yet ready to put Young on this list...

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    Gary-XDee Barnes
    8/24/15 3:44pm

    Man, people sure are upset about a woman remembering that a dude beat her. How dare she, obviously.

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      maxicat14Gary-X
      8/24/15 3:53pm

      She didn’t even bring up the blacklisting that followed her assault.

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      Cyber Mind GrrlGary-X
      8/24/15 4:25pm

      Of course. Blaming the victim is how the world works donchaknow.

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    Medieval KnievelDee Barnes
    8/24/15 3:36pm

    This behavior is particularly disappointing from a physician.

    #HipHopocraticOath

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      Bonnie Bernstein HaberdasheryMedieval Knievel
      8/24/15 5:49pm

      Thank you for a smile in a sea of brainless MRA trolls.

      PS- I’m a dude.

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    johnseaveyDee Barnes
    8/24/15 3:42pm

    I have a rule: If you only apologize when the news articles start bringing up the fact that you never apologized, you’re not really sorry.

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      structengrjohnseavey
      8/24/15 3:51pm

      I wonder if Dr. Dre apologized when charges were brought against him? I would really like to know.

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      beslertronjohnseavey
      8/24/15 4:00pm

      “I appologize” does not equal “I am sorry.”

      (I’ve had to deal with four years of my mayor being made to appologize to councillors in city hall against his wishes.)

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    Ladybug2Dee Barnes
    8/24/15 3:58pm

    I think society, as a whole, has this weird and ridiculous expectation that victims should STFU and move on because it builds character or some shit. Heaven forbid if the perpetrator is wealthy, powerful or has apologized (usually only after being caught or called out). Perhaps it ties into Christian beliefs on forgiveness (turn the other cheek). I’m not advocating for perps to be forever held down and back for mistakes or bad judgment, but we really need to do a better job of supporting victims and allowing them to deal with their grief and healing without making them feel bad if they’re anything but quiet and “dignified” in their suffering. Just look at Dee’s outcome. She was blacklisted for being a victim while the perp, his crew and the cameraman came up. No one is guaranteed success in life but it is majorly fucked up that time she could have spent on her own come up in the entertainment industry was actively thwarted. Even if tomorrow she gets all the opportunities that's time she'll never get back.

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      ProjectyourselfLadybug2
      8/24/15 6:50pm

      What people don’t seem to understand is that it re-victimizes us and does quite the opposite of helping us heal.. http://abusesanctuary.blogspot.com/2006/07/realit…

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      Taint NuttinLadybug2
      8/24/15 10:55pm

      Wonderfully said, but you’re giving people too much credit. In this specific case it’s coming off more calculated and cynical... and outright dumb. “I don’t like her reaction to getting beaten up by a man, so nobody is perfect, two wrongs don’t make a right, everybody shut up about this.”

      Dre has been all about the lowest common denominator for at least 15 years, and that’s what we’re getting now, those kinds of idiots coming out of the woodwork. It’s like cop or Mayweather apologists with this shit, the dumbest of the dumb taking the opportunity to find strength in numbers and make a stand.

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    RexxyDee Barnes
    8/24/15 3:59pm

    Congrats to Nick Denton and the entire advertisig team at Kinja for promoting hateful, and violent comments. Literally one of the top comments today ends with “...I want to punch you” from some angry douchebag.

    20% Nicer, thank you Nick Denton. If Denton had any brains he would get on his knees and carry around Sam Biddle’s ballsack in a gold chalice.

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      DR honkhonkhonk, tyvmRexxy
      8/24/15 4:17pm

      I don’t think I’ll last here much longer if (1) people who get flagged as hate speech trolls consistently retain their accounts, and (2) people who are cleverer and more consistent commenters than I am stay in the grey. 20% nicer... to the reddit community?

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      DR honkhonkhonk, tyvmDR honkhonkhonk, tyvm
      8/24/15 5:50pm

      PLEASE NOTE DO NOT REPLY TO SKILLBILLY OR STAR REPLIES TO HIS POST...

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    burnedoneanddoneDee Barnes
    8/24/15 3:41pm

    Oh my God, the greys. Ouch. I weep for humanity.

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      cyncerityburnedoneanddone
      8/24/15 4:05pm

      I’m surprised how much they came out in full force. She’s literally been talking about this for years and they’re just now getting mad?

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      ad infinitumburnedoneanddone
      8/24/15 6:50pm

      I haven’t even looked at the grays. The promoted comments are making me weep for humanity.

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    Ladybug2Dee Barnes
    8/24/15 4:03pm

    Dismiss is always an option folks.

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      #NotAllYzermanLadybug2
      8/24/15 4:10pm

      But what about dismister? WONT SOMEONE THINK OF THE MENZ

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      Ladybug2#NotAllYzerman
      8/24/15 4:47pm
      GIF
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