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    Brian Kelly'sUterusJason Parham
    7/08/15 3:32pm

    This kid smokes a lot of pot.

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      cheerful_exgirlfriendBrian Kelly'sUterus
      7/08/15 3:39pm

      I think it’s laced with Scientology because I smoke tons of weed and the most out there I get is speculating about what the hummingbirds I feed do when I’m not watching them.

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      DarkSabreXcheerful_exgirlfriend
      7/08/15 3:51pm

      You’re smoking the wrong pot then. I frequently have thought-trains that make the shit Jaden spouts off about sound like kindergarten conversations.

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    CatdogWhispererJason Parham
    7/08/15 3:30pm

    Exactly. Because your mind has a duality to it. So when one thought goes into your mind, it’s not just one thought, it has to bounce off both hemispheres of the brain. When you’re thinking about something happy, you’re thinking about something sad. When you think about an apple, you also think about the opposite of an apple

    I mean, there are probably other ways to interpret this as well, but from the way I’m reading it, I think Jaden Smith poops when he cums. Maybe the opposite, I’m not sure, I haven’t deciphered the whole equation yet.

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      dothedewCatdogWhisperer
      7/08/15 3:33pm

      I usually just fart when I cum, but it’s possible some poo sometimes escapes too.

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      MarksMakerCatdogWhisperer
      7/08/15 3:36pm
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    Cherith CutestoryJason Parham
    7/08/15 3:24pm

    You can say what you want about Scientologists they give a damn fine education.

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      dothedewCherith Cutestory
      7/08/15 3:34pm

      Yeah, but how come he won’t tell us the magical equation? Is that only available to Thetans? Why not share your advanced knowledge with the rest of us Jaden?

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      Cherith Cutestorydothedew
      7/08/15 3:41pm

      You couldn’t comprehend it, dew. Couldn’t even comprehend it.

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    A House In VirginiaJason Parham
    7/08/15 3:26pm

    I keep hearing this kid is “gender-fluid” like Miley.

    T/F?

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      det-devil-ailsA House In Virginia
      7/08/15 3:31pm

      He’s a Scientologist. They don’t believe in fluids.

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      LordBurleighA House In Virginia
      7/08/15 3:34pm

      Now now, gender fluidity is a real thing. No need to place it on the bullshit spectrum of Jaden Smith’s nonsense.

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    BaggyTrousers3Jason Parham
    7/08/15 3:24pm

    What if Jaden was transported to us from a distant planet? (Like Jupiter? Yes!)

    Jupiter?? Try further...

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      cheerful_exgirlfriendBaggyTrousers3
      7/08/15 3:35pm

      I think he did travel to Jupiter though because he seems much more stupid.

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      Urbane-Legendcheerful_exgirlfriend
      7/08/15 7:21pm

      I really really thought you were going to go with “stupider” there.

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    whatseriouslywhatJason Parham
    7/08/15 3:35pm

    The combined insufferability of Jaden and his sister (plus vague ties to Scientology) have completely ruined Will Smith for me. I can’t even watch reruns of Fresh Prince without thinking of these spoiled brats.

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      ChozoRuinswhatseriouslywhat
      7/08/15 3:41pm

      Perhaps you should not be such a Suppressive Person!

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      Booger Daviswhatseriouslywhat
      7/08/15 3:55pm

      The nut doesn’t fall far from the tree

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    Cam/ronJason Parham
    7/08/15 3:23pm

    All Of Your Idols Are Going To Start Writing Their Own Articles, And These Uninformed “Journalists” Will Become Obsolete.

    Why do I get the feeling he’ll soon be obsessed with the number 23?

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      Mok, the Magic ManJason Parham
      7/08/15 3:26pm

      I don’t know- most of the people I was at school with went through their Cure phase around age 17, too.

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        Cam/ronMok, the Magic Man
        7/08/15 3:36pm

        Same thing for my school - the Cure fans usually went on to become “hardcore goths” (Dead Can Dance! Switchblade Symphony! Christian Death!) or literature majors who ended up working at Borders or Barnes & Noble.

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        MuffMuffMok, the Magic Man
        7/08/15 4:10pm

        Late bloomers.

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      rudi_freudeJason Parham
      7/08/15 3:30pm
      GIF
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        LordBurleighJason Parham
        7/08/15 3:31pm

        Jason Parham, you've just won the Guess the Next Wachowskis Project Challenge! Your prize is a bit role as a poorly thought-out Asian character who, naturally, is proficient in martial arts!

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