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Flow BeeJennifer C. Martin
6/10/15 3:38pm
Matt Walsh Thinks Poor People are Lazy and Uneducated. Jesus Says the Kingdom of God Belongs to Them.

My number one counterargument to the “America is a Christian nation” nonsense. You cannot be Christian and hate poor people, especially not to the extent that Americans do. Flat out.
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  putinontheblitzFlow Bee
  6/10/15 3:45pm
  Jesus also said pray in private and those preaching in public are hypocrites. But...um....’Murica!
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  jpeayFlow Bee
  6/10/15 3:48pm
  While I admit that there is a lot of negative attitudes in this country toward the poor, we can confidently call this a Christian Nation because if you follow the money, there is no country or people EVER who give so much to the cause of eradicating poverty, suffering, hurt, disease etc...than the people of the USA and at the deepest level that money comes from people claiming Jesus as Lord and Savior.
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2DollarzJennifer C. Martin
6/10/15 3:32pm
Jesus wouldn't be caught dead in cargo shorts
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  Icecold Davis2Dollarz
  6/10/15 3:36pm
  Not for more than three days anyway.
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  krashkowIcecold Davis
  6/10/15 3:51pm
  That rates a solid 8/10 on the “Hiyooooo!” scale. Good work.
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HappyFunDadJennifer C. Martin
6/10/15 4:01pm
As a person who was raised Catholic...I am constantly amazed by Catholic people who shill for the Evangelical, conservative idiots in this country. I mean...don’t these folks realize that Evangelicals view Catholics as Pagans and sodomites?!?

I’ve lived in Baltimore, Illinois, South Carolina, Texas, and now rural Virginia. Pretty much everywhere in the South and in rural areas, I make sure to hide my background as someone raised Catholic as it will lead to very awkward questions as to why I hate Jesus or rape kids.

Hell...I hide the fact I read read and speak classical Latin as I find Evangelicals get really pissed when you point out their theology is based on some really...REALLY...terrible misconceptions.

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  ACunningStuntHappyFunDad
  6/10/15 4:35pm
  Serious question: People seriously still believe that crap about Catholics? I grew up in SC and Georgia and I don’t remember any backwards comments about Catholics, but maybe I wasn’t paying enough attention.
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  sleepiestACunningStunt
  6/10/15 6:25pm
  I grew up in East Tennessee and got plenty of shit for catholicism, from both Teachers and Students alike. It was almost always the protestants doing this, too, instead of anyone else.
  
  History class gets a little more interesting when you learn that the Gutenberg Press was only an important invention because it ended the tyranny of the Pope
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ItsAFake45Jennifer C. Martin
6/10/15 3:50pm
Jesus really had two message messages: help the less fortunate & stop being judgmental. Pretty much everything he said can be boiled down to category a or category b.

I feel like if Matt Walsh was there at the time he would have been yelling obscenities at Jesus while he carried the cross. “F@cking Hippie!!!!”
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  gutteranthemsItsAFake45
  6/10/15 4:03pm
  Well said
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  ally micklegammitItsAFake45
  6/10/15 4:07pm
  When I was younger, I had a trans friend. My brother (severe Christian) went ballistic, ranting about how evil it is and how God will judge me because trans people were crazy and horrible and a sin against God.
  
  I lost my temper and reminded him that Jesus was mates with the prostitutes, the tax collectors, and the ‘dregs’ of society — people everyone else thought were crazy, horrible, and a sin against God. And that Jesus actively avoided Christians (I wonder why).
  
  Shockingly, my brother — who is not prone to admit when he’s wrong (because he thinks he’s never wrong) went silent for about three minutes, came back over and apologised profusely and told me he needed to re-evaluate the way he’s been thinking about people. I was dumbfounded.
  
  As an atheist, I have no problems with any of the messages Jesus had. It’s his Daddy and fanboys I have an issue with.
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XkjacobJennifer C. Martin
6/10/15 4:08pm
I wonder where ideas like this come from. Oh right. Christianity as practiced.

http://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Christian…violence

Significant numbers of Christian pastorsordinarily would tell a woman being abused that she should continue to submit and to “trust that God would honor her action by either stopping the abuse or giving her the strength to endure it” and would never advise a battered wife to leave her husband or separate because of abuse.^[17] One mid-1980s survey of 5,700 pastors found that 26 percent of pastors ordinarily would tell a woman being abused that she should continue to submit and to “trust that God would honor her action by either stopping the abuse or giving her the strength to endure it” and that 71 percent of pastors would never advise a battered wife to leave her husband or separate because of abuse
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  WammerXkjacob
  6/10/15 4:32pm
  Yup, a lot of Churches would do this, but just as many would allow for divorce. Which opens another thorny discussion for these same churches, because the Bible is pretty clear on divorce always being wrong (unless the woman is unfaithful, natch). So, whenever the gay marriage debate comes up, I always ask folks at church if they’re going to have a sermon about divorce too. The answer is always no, with no real reason given. But I think the reason is always because a discussion of divorce would rile the church members who may not put as much in the offering plate, and we can’t allow that, no no.
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  Yotsuba&TochanXkjacob
  6/10/15 4:49pm
  Catholic Bishops in the 12 century twisted the passage where Peter takes a sword from a Roman soldier and cuts off his ear (when the Romans come to arrest Christ in the Garden of Gethsemane) as justification for the Crusades. They argued, well Peter was doing what he was supposed to be doing in other contexts, Christ just needed to be arrested so he could be crucified. (Btw pay no attention to the part where Christ warns “Those who live by the sword, die by the sword” immediately thereafter).
  
  There’s a long tradition of interpreting passages in the Bible to suit one’s prejudices and desires. It’s a simple reflection of the Sin of Pride—we want to define what’s right and wrong, just like Adam in the Garden of Eden.
  
  You could argue it means the Bible is wrong, that Christianity is wrong. But any religion or belief can be twisted to justify just about anything. In my view, the proper response is more theology, more understanding, and more love.
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MattJennifer C. Martin
6/10/15 3:43pm
As a liberal, progressive Christian, it is a relief to hear that I don't, in fact, exist, as it now means that I'm totally debt free. Good luck collecting your money from a figment of your imagination, motherfuckers!
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  Jennifer C. MartinMatt
  6/10/15 3:44pm
  Excellent idea
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  PapillonMatt
  6/10/15 3:57pm
  Liberal, progressive Christians unite! I too realize that I do not exist, but for some reason money keeps coming out of my bank account every month.
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김치전!Jennifer C. Martin
6/10/15 3:37pm
Poor Real Matt Walsh!

GIF

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  Erzulie김치전!
  6/10/15 3:50pm
  I love real Matt Walsh. How dare this choad share his name?
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  RobNYC김치전!
  6/10/15 4:00pm
  Fuck was the last episode of Veep HILARIOUS!
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Yotsuba&TochanJennifer C. Martin
6/10/15 4:07pm
Regarding Ephesians 5:22, you don’t need to go to other of Paul’s letters to see he’s not saying the wife is below the husband. Ephesians 5 states that the relationship that a husband and a wife should strive for is one parallel to Christ and his Church. That is, the husband should hold Christ-like love for his wife, just as Christ loved all humanity.

Christ humbled himself for the Church. He washed the feet of sinners, he worked tirelessly to help them, he cooked fish and brought bread for them, and he died on the Cross for them. Christ didn’t kick back on a sofa and demand his followers make him a sandwich while he watches football.

And Paul analogizes the wife’s role as one of the Church in its love for Christ. Where the Husband is acting in humility, humbleness, and in absolute service (“as a slave”) to the wife in love, the wife should not act as though the Husband’s humility has placed him below her. The Church’s role is one of absolute love of Christ, and just as the Husband strives to place hte wife above him (to be as a slave to her), the Wife should strive to put the Husband above her own interests.

Thus, in mutual roles, the husband and wife are mutually seeking to place each others interests above their own, through love.
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  WammerYotsuba&Tochan
  6/10/15 4:30pm
  Well crap, in I Corinthians 7:29, Paul tells the brethren (his words) that the time is short and that they should live as if they have no wives. He also says it’s better for a man not to marry, and then his description of marriage is far from flattering. In that same chapter in I Corinthians (verse 9) he basically says, get married if you can’t control your lustful urges—not exactly a picture of a mutually caring marriage.
  
  This is the problem I always have with any debates on marriage—I can find passages in the Bible that clearly lay out why I should and shouldn’t do the same thing. These passages are part of the reason that Augustine and other Church fathers came up with the idea that sex is icky in any context unless its for procreation only. And since fundamentalists have refused to allow for contextualizing scripture to its audience, I can’t even have a real discussion about this issue.
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  Yotsuba&TochanWammer
  6/10/15 4:42pm
  Corinthians 7:29 is a direct reference to Christ’s statement that it is better that people not get married, so as not be distracted from their service to God, if they are able. At least in the Catholic Church (my church), we view this as a call for celibacy—the reason why Priests and Nuns are celibate. Paul’s reference to those who are able to resist the sexual urges and be celibate should refrain from marriage—i.e. enter the priesthood in service to God.
  
  This is not to say that this is a calling to all people. At least in the modern Catholic view, there is nothing wrong with having sexual urges. Although the Priesthood is, in some ways, the ultimate highest calling to God, each person is given different vocations (that is roles) by God. Just as the Priesthood is a vocation, we can be called to the vocation of marriage—and yes, the urge for sexual union can be part of that calling.
  
  Sexual desire for a partner whom you love and are married to is not lust. Lust is the desire to control, to dominate and purely a desire to experience pleasure.
  
  Not all pleasure is against God’s will—Jesus produces great wine at a wedding as his first miracle after all. Enjoying a glass of great wine is one of life’s pleasures—under the right circumstances, the desire to have a nice glass of wine and/or to enjoy a glass of wine can be endorsed by Jesus himself. Can the same experience be perverted to a purpose other than within God’s intentions (i.e. to commit sin?) Well, obviously you can consume wine until you’re smashed, which is prohibited.
  
  So sexual desire and sexual pleasure are the same. In Proverbs, there are thanks to God in thinly veiled references to the glory of marital sexual pleasure. If you are in love, and as an expression of love you desire sexual union with your wife, and you experience this pleasure together, this is perfectly in accordance with God’s vision for marriage.
  
  Is the Priesthood a higher calling? Sure—but if it’s not what you were called to, you are simply doing what God brought you to do. There is, in a theological sense, nothing wrong with that.
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BIlllingtonJennifer C. Martin
6/10/15 3:36pm
Even among hideous, extremist piles of shit, he really stands out. Can you imagine what he would do if you told him about a brown man going into a building full of bankers and breaking all their shit in a yelling rage?

note: just imagine EuroJesus in that picture is brown like he obviously was in real life.
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  Wyette UrpBIlllington
  6/10/15 4:10pm
  I just posted this on FB this morning. Gawker kismet!
  
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  giantveggiesBIlllington
  6/10/15 4:10pm
  Wait. Why is that obvious?
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brycepuddingJennifer C. Martin
6/10/15 4:22pm
Jennifer C. Martin I don’t think you actually have ever read a verse of scripture in your life. If you did, you would not being using Jesus’s Christ name in the same sentences as your profane language. You claim to know what Jesus says and does but I don’t think you have any real clue.
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  Jennifer C. Martinbrycepudding
  6/10/15 4:24pm
  Bitch I graduated from a Christian college with a minor in Bible
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  festivusaziliJennifer C. Martin
  6/10/15 5:05pm
  I enjoy the implication that you somehow wrote this article full of Bible verses without reading them. That must have been a neat trick.
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Matt Walsh Thinks Poor People are Lazy and Uneducated. Jesus Says the Kingdom of God Belongs to Them.