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    Sean BrodyHamilton Nolan
    5/07/15 11:49am

    And it will even allow you, the lazy American with poor taste, to use your own god damn coffee in its little machine, if that is what it takes.

    Alternatively just use a coffee pot like a normal person, you fools.

    Sounds like someone had a big old cup of their favourite brew this morning - superiority with a shot of elitism.
    More of these pieces on how HamNo has the world figured out down to a nanosecond, and everyone else is just a fucking dope. It’s inspiring.

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      flamingolingoSean Brody
      5/07/15 11:56am

      I prefer starting morning with a shot of dark, undiluted HamNo snobbery. Really gets the ol’ pipes going.

      In all seriousness, there’s nothing elitist about suggesting the Keurig machine sucks. Normal coffee machines and grounds are far cheaper and more accessible. Hell, a French press or Moka pot are even more accessible since you don’t even need electricity to make them work. And the coffee will generally taste better.

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      Sean Brodyflamingolingo
      5/07/15 11:58am

      I only started drinking coffee about 3 years ago, so I have no discernment or preferences. It mostly all tastes the same - hot and black.
      Hence me calling HNo names. Such a dumb thing to get angry over.

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    Jennifer C. MartinHamilton Nolan
    5/07/15 11:36am

    I don’t know how people drink K-Cup coffee. It makes like half a cup. That’s not enough for me to be able to leave the house. I need like 3 K-cups worth of coffee in the morning.

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      toothpetardJennifer C. Martin
      5/07/15 11:40am
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      Sean BrodyJennifer C. Martin
      5/07/15 11:44am

      It makes 10 oz.
      And it’s free, so I can go and have a second one. Even a third.


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    Captain_CrutchHamilton Nolan
    5/07/15 11:53am

    Alternatively just use a coffee pot like a normal person, you fools.

    Better still, get a plastic pour-over cone for 2 bucks (most of them even come with a few filters to get you started!). This is an especially good option for your office, even more so if your office has a water cooler that offers hot water. Probably takes only a bit longer than the Keurig.

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      RorisanIDKCaptain_Crutch
      5/07/15 12:06pm

      Omg my mom’s boyfriend does this, bc I worked at Starbucks and introduced him to this method. I would literally rather do anything else, including just do without caffeine, if this is the only way I had to make a cup of coffee.

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      Captain_CrutchRorisanIDK
      5/07/15 12:27pm

      Are you sure you don’t just really hate your mom’s boyfriend...?

      To be clear, I’m talking about literally just the cheap plastic cone from Melita that goes over the top of your coffee cup. Coffee goes right into the cup. Done. Not some high-fallutin’ thing from Starbucks. What’s to hate or even notice, especially if you have hot water at the ready?

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    Dan SeitzHamilton Nolan
    5/07/15 11:42am

    Keurigs are useful to some degree, but the reusable K-Cup is currently something I’m in the middle of hacking. It’s a goddamn disaster.

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      JustanormaldudeDan Seitz
      5/07/15 11:51am

      you’re not “hacking” anything bud.

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      Medieval KnievelDan Seitz
      5/07/15 11:54am

      I tried to hack it at my last office, and the best I could do was slightly less watery bland coffee, with about a 15% chance of counter-covering FEMA disaster zone.

      1. Cut out the filter from a regular K-cup and put that inside your reusable cup, outside the mesh screen. (It slows things down.)

      2. Pack in as much coffee as you can, in an effort to exact some coffee-like essence.

      3. Hire some fucking interns to go get real coffee.

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    Shane RobertsHamilton Nolan
    5/07/15 11:44am

    Please enjoy our Coffee Gear Guide while I go dump this Keurig stock, thank you.

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      scottydangerShane Roberts
      5/07/15 12:08pm

      Swapped my Keurig out for an Aeropress a few months ago and I’m never looking back! If anything, I’ll pick up a Chemex next!

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      Miss-Prissscottydanger
      5/07/15 12:31pm

      I love my Aeropress. Now I use my french press exclusively to make tea.

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    BlatheringHamilton Nolan
    5/07/15 11:44am

    There are alternative brands of cups—biodegradable and sack-like both—that cut down on the plastic issue.

    Oddly, it’s been cheaper for our office to have a Keurig because the declining number of coffee drinkers meant each pot provided a cup or two before being dumped and a new one made. Now the one or two drinkers can make enough for themselves. Plus, they are coffee snobs so half the time they bring their own higher-end beans.

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      humanSuitcaseBlathering
      5/07/15 11:49am

      Love the sack-like ones for feeling so sack-like.

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      MisteryCatBlathering
      5/07/15 12:12pm

      I keep a Keurig in my office. I use San Francisco Bay K-cups, which use dramatically less plastic. There aren’t enough coffee drinkers to have a community coffee pot, and this is the only method that doesn’t involve washing dishes (other than my coffee cup) every time I want coffee, and dealing with loose coffee grounds in my office. This is one of those topics where I truly don’t understand the passionate care so many people have about what other people are doing!

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    Jennifer C. MartinHamilton Nolan
    5/07/15 11:41am

    Do Gawker offices have a Keurig machine? It’s all my office has, and you have to pay a membership fee to join the “coffee club” to get some. I do not partake

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      Sean BrodyJennifer C. Martin
      5/07/15 11:53am

      Do Gawker offices have a Keurig machine?

      I’m gonna bet not.

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      dronesandgroansJennifer C. Martin
      5/07/15 12:03pm

      You have to pay to have coffee in your office? What fresh hell is that?

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    Joel_CRHamilton Nolan
    5/07/15 11:37am

    Say it with me folks: Aeropress.

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      toothpetardJoel_CR
      5/07/15 11:38am

      5 seconds and done.

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      HypnoCatJoel_CR
      5/07/15 11:42am

      Aeropress? Please...go on.

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    JRuHamilton Nolan
    5/07/15 11:39am

    I thought Keurig was more for office settings. So you won’t have a big pot sitting on the burner for hours with maybe no one drinking it. Sure hope it’s not popular in homes.

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      ComeOnNowDamnitJRu
      5/07/15 11:45am

      My mother and literally every single one of her mid-50s and up friends have one.

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      javellisantJRu
      5/07/15 11:47am

      My father-in-law used the hell out of his. He’s 85, and it’s simplicity gave him some independence, so we never pointed out it’s wastefulness. Then the machine itself crapped out, adding 8 useless pounds to the waste stream, and we all shrugged helpfully. We got him a nice stainless french press, but he tried to boil the water in it on the burner, so it’s got a sad, burnished patina on it now. Needless to say, his wife is back to making his coffee.

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    AliceInWunderlandHamilton Nolan
    5/07/15 11:52am
    GIF

    We have a refillable Keurig at the office and everyone brings delicious coffee from home.

    A coffee pot would be terrible because some of my coworkers like weakass coffee.

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      chancyrendezvousAliceInWunderland
      5/07/15 12:40pm

      And for those of us heathen decaf drinkers, it’s the only way we can get coffee at work.

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      AliceInWunderlandchancyrendezvous
      5/07/15 12:46pm

      Yeah, I switch to decaf in the afternoon, so I’m with you on that.

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