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    Morifarty's ringtoneEllie Shechet
    3/06/15 1:34pm

    "But if you can find a girl who you can go to an EDM concert with, have a conversation with, who will sit on the couch and watch you play GTA for three hours—and then you go to bed and have amazing sex? That should be your girlfriend."

    THIS IS WHAT I IMAGINE HELL IS LIKE NO PLEASE FUCKING NO I DO NOT EVER WANT TO BE YOUR GIRLFRIEND

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      abumpynightMorifarty's ringtone
      3/06/15 1:44pm

      Okay seriously I must be insane because this really does sound like the early years of my relationship. I used to love to sit around and watch my boyfriend play like Devil May Cry for several hours (Yes, I did play myself too). We've been together for 11 years now, am I just extremely weird or what?

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      JazzMorifarty's ringtone
      3/06/15 1:45pm

      I actually teared up when I saw that statement because that's my ideal boyfriend (at this age). Before that, I had absolutely no interest in Ansel Elgort but I don't know. I'm just a 19 year old college student.

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    Madeleine DaviesEllie Shechet
    3/06/15 1:39pm

    Probs some EDM song you wouldn't know Probs some EDM song you wouldn't know Probs some EDM song you wouldn't know

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      DuchessCrazyLindaMadeleine Davies
      3/06/15 1:41pm

      But really, you should be glad you don't know that song, because I bet it's horrible.

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      Morifarty's ringtoneMadeleine Davies
      3/06/15 1:42pm

      I am reevaluating my thoughts on the death penalty rn, tbh

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    BeyonceIsTheLastUnicornEllie Shechet
    3/06/15 1:56pm

    Now that I can tell this-guy-whose-name-I-just-learned and Miles Teller apart, I would like to ask the Jez community:

    Ansel Elgort or Miles Teller?

    There is a right answer.

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      dramamonkeyBeyonceIsTheLastUnicorn
      3/06/15 2:56pm

      MILES TELLER.

      You guys. He's like my inappropriate celebrity crush. (JK, not inappropriate, google tells me he's 28. TWENTY EIGHT. That's only 5 years younger than I am. YASSS)

      He was the high point of that terrible "Footloose" remake.

      GIF


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      mit0mat3BeyonceIsTheLastUnicorn
      3/06/15 3:27pm

      Teller all the way.
      I must admit it took a bit for him to grow on me, I never disliked him I was just caught off guard by him like "who is this weird looking dude on my screen?" (I know that's mean) but I find him so endearing now. I kinda love him.
      Ansel Elgort on the other hand has a name that reminds me of ground flaxseeds in water (constipation hey) and his lips bother me so much :/ he seems perfectly nice though (IMO), I just find his face oddly irritating.

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    rollsniderollEllie Shechet
    3/06/15 1:39pm

    He already made me uneasy by playing Shailene Woodley's brother in Divergent, then turning around and playing her boyfriend in The Fault in Our Stars.

    Now I straight-up hate this kid and want to throw him in a hole with Justin Bieber and Arianna Grande just to see who triumphs and crawls out.

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      Morifarty's ringtonerollsnideroll
      3/06/15 1:47pm

      This is like when I found out Dexter and the actress who played his sister were married.

      10/10 do not want.

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      AKProllsnideroll
      3/06/15 1:53pm

      He already made me uneasy by playing Shailene Woodley's brother in Divergent, then turning around and playing her boyfriend in The Fault in Our Stars.

      Eh, that's Hollywood Aaron Taylor-Johnson and Elizabeth Olsen played a married couple in Godzilla and they're the twins Pietro & Wanda in the upcoming Avengers. Though side note, their chemistry as a married couple was pretty terrible. My favorite line from any Godzilla review (which was I movie I enjoyed for the most part) was "the MUTOs have more chemistry than the leads."

      But count me in on the Ansel Elgort NOPE train. This dude does absolutely nothing for me.

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    dalilaEllie Shechet
    3/06/15 1:37pm

    I never feel old until I look at someone like Ansel Elgort, think "I'd guess this kid's about 14", and then realize he's 20.

    I wonder from whom today will be eternal, indeed.

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      Morifarty's ringtonedalila
      3/06/15 1:46pm

      He might have been born 20 years ago, but he is 14. He will always be 14. In fifty years, he will still manage to be 14. He embodies the age of 14 perfectly. BECAUSE 14 YEAR OLDS ARE THE ACTUAL FUCKING WORST.

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      BecauseoftheImplicationMorifarty's ringtone
      3/06/15 6:19pm

      I just liked, like, 14 of your comments consecutively without realizing they were all you. I feel like such a stalker now that I've just gone ahead and followed you - partially in the hopes that I'll see the little blue check and be like, "Hold up, Implication - have you already liked 49 of this person's comments today?"

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    AikageEllie Shechet
    3/06/15 1:35pm

    Dill spill. Pure dill spill

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      randall pinkAikage
      3/06/15 1:41pm

      Perfect, accurate deployment of dill spill.

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      DuchessCrazyLindaAikage
      3/06/15 1:42pm

      That is some foamy dill spill right there!

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    paultoesEllie Shechet
    3/06/15 2:00pm

    But he isn't just a douche. If you want to hate on somebody for their privilege he is an excellent candidate.

    "Growing up in Manhattan the son of a Vogue fashion photographer and an opera director, Elgort began his entree into the modeling and performing world early, and his early success could, perhaps, reek a little bit of nepotism or privilege—his acting debut off-Broadway, fresh out of high school, was written up for Vogue."

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      dalilapaultoes
      3/06/15 2:04pm

      HAHAHAHAHAHAHA

      HAHAH

      A

      holy shit.

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      MenstrualKrampuspaultoes
      3/06/15 2:39pm

      "perhaps...a little bit."

      LOL

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    ziggybloodlustEllie Shechet
    3/06/15 1:37pm

    Wait. Pause. Is that picture on GQ supposed to be the same guy that's in all of these other pictures?

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      DuchessCrazyLindaziggybloodlust
      3/06/15 1:41pm

      Right? I'm so confused.

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      ziggybloodlustDuchessCrazyLinda
      3/06/15 1:42pm

      Photoshop is for everyone I guess, because that does not even look remotely like him.

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    Morifarty's ringtoneEllie Shechet
    3/06/15 1:36pm

    He is horrible. Everything about him is horrible. You have converted a new believer because as a direct result of this post I now also hate him and request to be involved in your duct tape hornet nest situation.

    Before this post I had no idea he existed.

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      NightCheeseNightManMorifarty's ringtone
      3/06/15 1:38pm

      It's that goddawful instagram duckface shot that did it for me. *shudders*

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      TwirltwirlNightCheeseNightMan
      3/06/15 2:03pm

      Sealed the deal for me also. I'm not sure what it is, but something about this kid really rubs me the wrong way.

      Like Ellie said, he reminds me of someone I grew up with, but I can't pin point who. Hopefully he'll mature?! Trying to be nice.

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    The GaysianEllie Shechet
    3/06/15 1:44pm

    I've got a present for him.

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      dalilaThe Gaysian
      3/06/15 2:02pm

      At first glance I thought that unicorn's head was a dick.

      So.

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      ziggybloodlustdalila
      3/06/15 2:12pm

      Me too! Still works, I guess?

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