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    OverlySexualizedVelociraptorKara Brown
    2/27/15 7:31pm

    I HAVE ONE!!

    Ok. Please tell me if this is Shade:

    Background: I am like, normal looking. I may be considered chubby but that's only because I live in Southern California. I did gain a fair amount of weight a few months ago, but seriously like 10lbs.

    Same time I gained the weight, I was working for a large non profit. My boss' boss was 8 months pregnant at the time, and while we had had some interaction, we were certainly not work-friends. Barely acquaintances. SO. One day, I walk into communal kitchen to see Pregnant Boss smothering her toast in butter. Like going full-out on the butter. Both sides. She turns to me and says, "Oh good. I was afraid someone would judge me but I when I saw it was you, I thought: 'OverlySexualizedVelociraptor won't judge me for my butter. I'm safe.' "

    UM. She was shading me, right?? Like even if she wasn't the fact that a) it's been months and b) I don't even work there and I'm still thinking about it means it was shade. Right?!

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      Charlotte29 aka Rob KOverlySexualizedVelociraptor
      2/28/15 3:05pm

      UH DEFINITELY SHADE. Also, wtf? Unnecessary lady!

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      digbetteOverlySexualizedVelociraptor
      2/28/15 8:41pm

      Lol. I'm only a humble Shade Padawan, but if you don't know for sure, it was probably shade.

      That or she was trying for camaraderie and didn't get that 'we both fat!' isn't something many people are ready to wholeheartedly embrace.

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    adultosaur married anna on the astral planeKara Brown
    2/27/15 5:15pm

    i feel like 8 times out of 10

    it isnt shade

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      acornadultosaur married anna on the astral plane
      2/27/15 5:26pm

      I know, and that's sad. For me. I love the actual instances of shade. I want a Shade Court post with all shade all day so I can laugh and be entertained.

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      ladypeanutacorn
      2/27/15 5:36pm

      more shaaaaaade

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    EllaCindersKara Brown
    2/27/15 5:41pm

    "Shade" is the new "Ironic" — everybody uses it but almost no one really knows what it means.

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      Tequila MockingbirdEllaCinders
      2/27/15 5:48pm

      Alanis knows what you're talking 'bout.

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      vangoghsearEllaCinders
      2/27/15 5:59pm

      dont forget "literally".People magazine had a headline quote from david beckham where-in beckham said "I am lierally an uber driver." Now that i thinkabout it— was the writer of people's headline throwing shade at beckham by pointing out his misuse of "literally"?

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    EmilylorKara Brown
    2/27/15 5:27pm

    they're both still obsessed with Rihanna because she is a flawless perfect person and that reminds me to add her to my inspiration board of amazing women

    I had a professor who thinks a financial collapse would be cool because Greece would use drachmas again (wtf)

    I'm glad the last one was shade because with every correct use of shade, I learn.

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      MelUK (aka kayakgrrl)Emilylor
      2/27/15 6:30pm

      Your professor has a point. I've heard an argument for Greece leaving the Euro, in that it would be much easier for Greece if they could adjust their exchange rate, even thought there'd likely be crazy inflation, instead of being stuck with the Euro, which is held strong by countries like Germany. (Actually, it might only be Germany, as I don't really know if any of the other Eurozone countries are doing so great.) Meanwhile, dumping Greece from the Euro would help make it much stronger for the rest of the countries, as there would be a lot less concern about its value without Greece dragging it down.

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      EmilylorMelUK (aka kayakgrrl)
      2/27/15 7:07pm

      eh. I'm not so up on economics, but from everything I've heard, bankruptcy in Greece would be a global financial disaster. And he isn't even thinking about it like that, he just thinks drachma is a cool old currency.

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    audcatKara Brown
    2/27/15 5:18pm

    Ha! I watched that episode of Empire last night and when Cookie said that, I about spat out my pizza. SO SIMPLE, SO GOOD. Cookie is Queen.

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      Lisa Simpsonaudcat
      2/27/15 5:52pm

      Am I ruining it by being a tiny bit sad that there are still storylines where women are fighting over a cheating man tho?

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    DashleyinCaliKara Brown
    2/27/15 5:20pm

    Here's a good rule of thumb: A meme is almost never shade.

    So this is a good idea. Maybe some easy rules for people to follow would help to fix this epidemic of incorrectly labeling Shade. Are there enough rules that we could create a well-organized flowchart, perhaps?

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      kristinbytesDashleyinCali
      2/27/15 6:29pm

      A lovely idea but so many people can't even remember the main rule that a straight up insult is not shade. It's just an insult.

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      Shiny Chrome WitnessedbotDashleyinCali
      2/27/15 9:42pm

      I feel that shade is too much of an art for flow-charts. One cannot create a great sonnet by flow-chart, One cannot create a master symphony by flow-chart. One cannot create a Picasso by flow-chart. If you need a flow chart, best to just admire the work of others.

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    lisaroweKara Brown
    2/27/15 5:44pm

    can we get a cookie interview on jez?? MAKE IT HAPPEN PLEASE.

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      girlfmkittyKara Brown
      2/27/15 6:10pm

      Cookie rules at everything. One more time -

      GIF

      GIF
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        ToooldforthisKara Brown
        2/27/15 10:30pm

        So, I think I have a handle on what shade is now, thanks to this glorious column. I have a question. Is it only shade if it is intended as an insult? Because I may have inadvertently been shading people for a very long time.

        The thing is, I can't do the whole lie through my teeth thing with people. So, if somebody is wearing a dress I hate I cannot lie and say that I like it. I generally will say something non-committal like, "I couldn't get away with wearing it". I don't MEAN for it to be insulting, as such, but I don't want to give anybody the impression that I'm saying that I love it, either. Have I been indulging in unintentional shade here? Or does intent make it shade?

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          Charlotte29 aka Rob KToooldforthis
          2/28/15 3:10pm

          If I've learned anything from reading these columns, it's that intent plays a big role in whether or not something is shade. Having said THAT though, even if you didn't intend for comments like that to be insulting, they still came from a place of dislike for the person/thing in question, so maybe that still constitutes shade.

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        SuffersfoolsgladlyKara Brown
        2/27/15 9:16pm

        Wait. Is there ever shade? I check in here now and then but it's usually not shade. Is that me? Did I miss the shade?

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          Nihongo Hanashimasen.Suffersfoolsgladly
          2/28/15 1:25am

          Last post entry is Shade perfection.

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