Discussion
  • Read More
    EldritchRebecca "Burt" Rose
    2/01/15 11:05pm

    Man, the Night Vale Elementary School has really stepped it up.

    Gabi sounds a lot like me at that age. I wrote a lot of stuff that got me sent down to the office... But at least the school shrink was nice, she always had Milky Ways on her desk.

    Reply
    <
    • Read More
      OnlydancingEldritch
      2/01/15 11:07pm

      I was about to say, this is very much like stuff I wrote as a kid... Nobody would talk to me in middle school. I had a large vocabulary and a mean streak.

      Reply
      <
    • Read More
      Cocopop!Eldritch
      2/01/15 11:13pm

      Star Eldritch's comment if you too were sent to the school shrink for writing weird poetry. (stars comment)

      Reply
      <
  • Read More
    RedWillDanaherRebecca "Burt" Rose
    2/01/15 11:04pm

    So she's nine now?

    Reply
    <
    • Read More
      applejuiceRedWillDanaher
      2/02/15 2:05am

      I'm having flashbacks to my 1989/1990 winning United Way essay (I was around 10 and they made us enter at school, my parents had never seen it). I forgot about it after I wrote it but then my mom got a call saying I'd won. We went to a banquet and they read out what may be the darkest, most depressing 500 words a 10 year old ever wrote regarding Hurricane Hugo. People didn't know whether to cry or look aghast. I was a little embarrassed hearing it out loud, but the baked ziti at the buffet and the savings bond made up for it. (Until I found out I couldn't touch the savings bond until I was 18! Crappy prize!)

      Reply
      <
  • Read More
    Mitch ConnorRebecca "Burt" Rose
    2/01/15 11:27pm

    Little kids writing fucked up things is the best. When I was in fourth grade we had to write an explorer journal for our age of discovery unit imagining how it must have been for them, and I got Jacques Cartier, so, because he was looking for the Northwest Passage, I wrote about how they were starving and men were dying, but they had to take the clothes off the dead men for warmth, so they were dumping their naked bodies into the icy depths of the st. lawrence river.

    I think it upset my dad.

    Also, that was my peak as a writer. Even as a pretentious, shitty undergrad who thought she would write the great American novel I never came up with anything nearly so awesome and dark again.

    Reply
    <
    • Read More
      nullMitch Connor
      2/01/15 11:33pm

      Thank you for reminding me! I remember writing a VERY long essay about Columbus Day that definitely focused on the body count & torture. It was very colorful. I was 10.

      Reply
      <
    • Read More
      Mitch Connornull
      2/01/15 11:36pm

      But did you stain it with liptons and burn the edges? That's how you know it's legit.

      Reply
      <
  • Read More
    GELLA - LLAPRebecca "Burt" Rose
    2/01/15 11:06pm
    GIF
    Reply
    <
    • Read More
      VonQuesoGELLA - LLAP
      2/01/15 11:29pm

      This is extraordinarily terrifying.

      Reply
      <
    • Read More
      HippieChickGELLA - LLAP
      2/01/15 11:57pm

      NIGHTMARE FUEL

      Reply
      <
  • Read More
    Rebecca "Burt" RoseRebecca "Burt" Rose
    2/02/15 12:56am

    Somebody else mentioned this but Gabi isn't even the darkest part of this shit—"On Friday I take [the canaries] out.." WHAT THE FUCK OMG

    Reply
    <
    • Read More
      Legless Legolas' LEGO LassRebecca "Burt" Rose
      2/02/15 1:05am

      Parakeets.

      Reply
      <
    • Read More
      Rebecca "Burt" RoseLegless Legolas' LEGO Lass
      2/02/15 1:06am

      whatever birds

      Reply
      <
  • Read More
    QuintRebecca "Burt" Rose
    2/01/15 11:06pm

    Why is this news? Everyone knows Gabi don't fuck around.

    Reply
    <
    • Read More
      Dali Lana Goo-GooRebecca "Burt" Rose
      2/01/15 11:07pm

      Conflicting feelings here. Part of me wants to give Gabi a slow clap standing o, but the other part wants to hang out with her over snacks and have a chat, just make sure everything is cool.

      Reply
      <
      • Read More
        EmmerdoesNOTrepresentmeDali Lana Goo-Goo
        2/01/15 11:45pm

        Yes! Very much both of these! She may be a very well adjusted and perfectly fine little girl... or there may be some absolute shiiiite going on in her life that she needs to be gotten the hell out of. Hopefully the former.

        Reply
        <
    • Read More
      Welcome To The MidwestRebecca "Burt" Rose
      2/01/15 11:09pm

      That, or Pegasus School, Huntington Beach, is like one of those Russian gymnastics training gyms where some crazed former Soviet Union school mar'm screams at the kids "YOU WRITE!!! IN SOVIET RUSSIA, ALL HOUSES BURN!!! ALL OF THEM!!! AND LEEEEETLE BABY CRY CRY CHILDREN LIKE YOU SUFFER!!! YOU WRITE ABOUT PAIN!! WRITE!!!!"

      Reply
      <
      • Read More
        Edie Beale's CostumeWelcome To The Midwest
        2/02/15 12:27am

        I heard this all in my head in Nadia from New Girl's voice.

        GIF
        Reply
        <
    • Read More
      BlanksheetRebecca "Burt" Rose
      2/01/15 11:15pm

      Gabi must be a big Stephen King fan. Which is about right; I discovered him a year later and have bought his books ever since. I'm gonna say she just finished Carrie.

      Reply
      <
      • Read More
        ArghBlanksheet
        2/01/15 11:21pm

        I'm thinking a different King story.

        GIF
        Reply
        <
      • Read More
        opheeliaBlanksheet
        2/01/15 11:22pm

        Parents don't always know what their kids are reading. It's a nerdy form of rebellion that can weird outcomes.

        Reply
        <
    • Read More
      doit2julia!Rebecca "Burt" Rose
      2/01/15 11:11pm

      Does anyone else hear Gabi's verse in the voice of Christopher Walken?

      Reply
      <
      • Read More
        LadyGrinningSouldoit2julia!
        2/01/15 11:25pm

        I do now!

        Reply
        <