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    deerloverHamilton Nolan
    5/28/14 10:43am

    connecting with the dynamic and authentic lifestyles of the Millennialâ„¢ generation.

    Gross. I'm a millenial and this makes me want to vomit.

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      toothpetarddeerlover
      5/28/14 10:46am

      but your lifestyle, is it dynamic and authentic/unconventional as the pizza hut brand?

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      Hamilton Nolandeerlover
      5/28/14 10:48am

      Thank you for bringing your precious demographic presence to Gawker.com! Please visit our advertising partners!

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    SeanibusHamilton Nolan
    5/28/14 10:54am

    I live in a small town in Northern California, where "farm-to-table" is every day. We shop at farmers markets. We have excellent produce in our boutique grocery stores. We grow outrageous stuff in our back yards. The burgers at our diners come from Nieman Ranch and are served with delicate slices of heirloom tomato and onion on house made sourdough rolls, with hand cut fries. And as a result, sometimes I just want a big fucking round slab of bread smeared with tomato sauce and cheese, cooked in a big industrial oven and served with two choices of beer: "regular" and "lite"

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      quietgrrrlSeanibus
      5/28/14 11:02am

      Excellent comment. I'm serious. Also, can I ask what town? I grew up in Sonoma and Mendocino counties.

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      I can't wait to be deadSeanibus
      5/28/14 11:03am

      God damn, your life is so hard.

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    Flatizza4EvaHamilton Nolan
    5/28/14 10:50am

    Tell me what you envision for an average Pizza Hut instead of your normal snark, Hamilton. You rant on their quality and you often rant on fast food/quick service restaurant wages so tell me specifically how a Pizza Hut should operate. What should they serve, how much should their workers make and then tell me what you expect the net profit of that location would be so that we make sure it's something that gets funded with the capital it needs to exist.

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      Hamilton NolanFlatizza4Eva
      5/28/14 10:55am

      Marijuana

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      I Wish My Name Was DaxFlatizza4Eva
      5/28/14 11:07am
      GIF
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    LordBurleighHamilton Nolan
    5/28/14 10:43am

    It even included imperfections to give it an air of authenticity.

    Commentary not necessary.

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      Not A SnortLordBurleigh
      5/28/14 10:48am

      ...seeking food perceived as higher quality

      Commentary not needed, indeed.

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    Paul DimitrovHamilton Nolan
    5/28/14 11:45am

    While I agree that Pizza Hut "food" is barely worthy of the descriptor "edible," is the real subtext here the always-present assertion that "real pizza only exists in New York?"

    The vehemence with which New Yorkers assert the superiority of their pizza is the weirdest psychological tick....

    Also: Your pizza, and city, are gross. The dough is often good, but the slices are too big, and it is most often prepared/served in an environment that screams "food poisoning."

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      Li'l BiscuitPaul Dimitrov
      5/28/14 1:46pm

      What you describe is not real NY pizza, but NY Utility Slice pizza. Big difference.

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      Paul DimitrovLi'l Biscuit
      5/28/14 2:13pm

      "It's not that my city's pizza is gross, or overly-large, it's that you're eating the wrong type of my disgusting city's gross pizza."

      Point taken.

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    Cherith CutestoryHamilton Nolan
    5/28/14 10:43am

    Goat cheese and prosciutto stuffed crust or GTFO.

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      merekatCherith Cutestory
      5/28/14 11:36am

      Only if you're gonna stick some uncured kosher hotdogs in there while you're at it.

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    ArturoHamilton Nolan
    5/28/14 11:33am

    Hand tossed? Garlic butter brushed crust? So they realized that Dominos offers a better fast food pizza and is trying to replicate that. Got it.

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      Defender90CAHamilton Nolan
      5/28/14 5:23pm

      In the world of franchised pizzerias, there are far worse choices to be made than Pizza Hut - namely, all of the other ones.

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        unfortunatelylostburnerHamilton Nolan
        5/28/14 10:43am

        Snark all you want, but that cover photo looks fucking delicious.

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          ghostbustersisacatunfortunatelylostburner
          5/28/14 1:18pm

          No it doesn't. It looks like a smashed up garbage pizza that I would be so pissed about that I would call the store and demand my fucking money back.

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          unfortunatelylostburnerghostbustersisacat
          5/28/14 1:20pm

          To each his own. I think it looks doughy, saucy, cheesy and wonderful. Don't really care that it shifted en route.

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        BrtStlndHamilton Nolan
        5/28/14 11:11am

        PIZZACRUNCH /DISRUPT

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