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    cheerful_exgirlfriendNeetzan Zimmerman
    12/16/13 3:03pm

    Let's talk technique here folks.

    I guess one can have a really quick handy and that would be best considering where they are (hey let's hide behind this post where no one in the store can see us)

    But do you, as a guy, want to be known for your ability to "finish" really quickly, even if it's because you are dressed as Santa and getting a handy in public?

    Also something in that general area had to be used to wipe her hands after. People are so gross.

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      IAmAMeatPopsiclecheerful_exgirlfriend
      12/16/13 3:16pm

      That really must have been a sticky situation.

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      Hannibal the Cannibalcheerful_exgirlfriend
      12/16/13 3:18pm

      Also something in that general area had to be used to wipe her hands after. People are so gross

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    purrrrnerNeetzan Zimmerman
    12/16/13 2:44pm
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      Babylegspurrrrner
      12/16/13 2:45pm

      There's always the one.

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      VeryWellpurrrrner
      12/16/13 2:46pm

      That's the stuff!

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    JohnMcClanesSmirkNeetzan Zimmerman
    12/16/13 3:33pm

    See, this is why we can't have nice things America.

    Whenever Europeans ask why we're so strict with alcohol sales when they casually serve it in 7-11s and McDonalds and such I point to SantaCon as exhibit A. We have an excess bro culture that, at some unknown point, won the race to the bottom and convicted millions of young Americans that getting plastered beyond reason is somehow cute or evidence of "living".

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      SirIanMcKellenIsMyImaginaryGrandpa's Computer DiedJohnMcClanesSmirk
      12/16/13 7:33pm

      Britain is just as bad, maybe worse. Brits are SERIOUS about drinkin' til they puke. And they have 24 hour bars!

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      JohnMcClanesSmirkSirIanMcKellenIsMyImaginaryGrandpa's Computer Died
      12/16/13 7:38pm

      Fair point.

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    Yukon KizmiazNeetzan Zimmerman
    12/16/13 2:43pm

    There's a North Pole joke here somewhere...

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      Cam/ronYukon Kizmiaz
      12/16/13 2:47pm

      The other Christmastime zinger is "Come inside, it's warm!"

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      rwilco4469Cam/ron
      12/16/13 3:08pm

      Oh Cum All Ye Faithful?

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    scott-larockNeetzan Zimmerman
    12/16/13 3:13pm

    You guys are funny. You really think a bunch of middle-class, white 20-somethings from the outer boroughs, Jersey & Long Island are actually gonna face any charges for being dicks in public? NYPD likes those guys, for some crazy reason.

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      sunstrokedscott-larock
      12/16/13 3:31pm

      Because the NYPD consists almost entirely of those guys. Ever ask a cop for directions? They don't have a fucking clue because they all live in Nassau county.

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      lemonsmarksunstroked
      12/16/13 3:47pm

      To be fair do you think the influx of hipsters into the city makes for great police material?

      Nope! NOpe! Nooooo!

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    BabylegsNeetzan Zimmerman
    12/16/13 2:53pm

    Maybe he's just really passionate about that Healthcare Reform literature.

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      SlickWillieBabylegs
      12/16/13 2:55pm

      I'm actually kind of wondering if this was just a desperate ploy by the Obama Administration to get young people to sign up for insurance.

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    The Ghost of ¯\_(ツ)_/¯ AKA BabyStepsNeetzan Zimmerman
    12/16/13 3:14pm

    I guess she's doing her part in promoting good health.

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      axiomatikThe Ghost of ¯\_(ツ)_/¯ AKA BabySteps
      12/17/13 12:22pm

      Maybe the whole thing is just a viral marketing campaign for healthcare.gov?

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      The Ghost of ¯\_(ツ)_/¯ AKA BabyStepsaxiomatik
      12/17/13 1:43pm

      Yea, herpes virus marking perhaps.

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    AuntEggmaBlowtorchNeetzan Zimmerman
    12/16/13 2:44pm

    At least he's not coming down someone's chimney.

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      Tyrant BigglesNeetzan Zimmerman
      12/16/13 6:04pm

      Santacon may be rife with drunken debauchery but pointing that out still counts as being part of the War on Christmas.

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        Pink SkullNeetzan Zimmerman
        12/16/13 2:57pm

        Really trying to get the word out on healthcare reform.

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