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    SWOSU_AssholeGabrielle Bluestone
    12/10/13 8:24pm

    Uhhh sorry sweetheart but tacos aren't $2 here in the south. This is authentic food.

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      Gabrielle BluestoneSWOSU_Asshole
      12/10/13 8:27pm

      I actually tried to call Alondras De Jalisco to find out how much his bail would be in their tacos but no one answered, so I went with the Chipotle estimate.

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      Gabrielle BluestoneGabrielle Bluestone
      12/10/13 8:28pm

      This is what they pay me the big bucks for, clearly.

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    flatbushfashionistaGabrielle Bluestone
    12/10/13 8:25pm

    Not to get all Freudian, but isn't six inches a bit short to qualify as a "sword."

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      Gabrielle Bluestoneflatbushfashionista
      12/10/13 8:26pm

      I had that thought too — that's why I included the length — but virtually every Texas news source has referred to it as a sword and not a knife, so sword it is.

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      flatbushfashionistaGabrielle Bluestone
      12/10/13 8:27pm

      Touché!

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    Shut Up!Gabrielle Bluestone
    12/10/13 8:23pm

    I'm guessing they were Doritos Locos...

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      ratchedShut Up!
      12/10/13 8:38pm

      I'm betting they were pink tacos. Sounds like he was going to make a run for the border, too.

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      Shut Up!ratched
      12/10/13 8:40pm
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    TRUMP DELENDUS EST (fka Chatham Harrison)Gabrielle Bluestone
    12/10/13 8:32pm

    When they realized that he'd only pulled a knife, rather than the traditional pistol, bystanders presumed he was mentally disturbed. It's Texas tradition that only the state is supposed to kill the mentally ill. He was fortunate that they stuck to their principles.

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      nachotacoTRUMP DELENDUS EST (fka Chatham Harrison)
      12/10/13 9:38pm

      It's the other way around. The mentally ill tend to kill the innocents. :( Then the cops kill the innocent dogs, then finally, the mentally ill. It's the circle of life.

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      TRUMP DELENDUS EST (fka Chatham Harrison)nachotaco
      12/10/13 9:40pm

      Sounds more like the hyperbolic paraboloid of crazy.

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    Alexander_Crouton-SkitchGabrielle Bluestone
    12/10/13 8:38pm

    This is my favorite comment from the linked article from one of the trolls:

    Sounds like something he learned from the Messiah Barry.

    A simple "Thanks, Obama!" wasn't good enough for him.

    GIF
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      jelly71Alexander_Crouton-Skitch
      12/10/13 8:40pm

      They can literally bring any news story back to him, can't they? It's like the only motherfucking talent these people have.

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      Alexander_Crouton-Skitchjelly71
      12/10/13 8:45pm

      I know. It snowed here today. Sounds like Barry's global warming fascist takeover of the communist Kenyan leader agenda Hawaii Chicago politics as usual Reverend Wright Al Sharpton Democrat Liberal frozen water takeover again.

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    GregSamsaGabrielle Bluestone
    12/10/13 8:24pm

    Forgive my ignorance of blades, but I thought swords were longer than six inches. Is this six Grindr inches, where it actually appeared longer to the wielder than to the observer? Or was this six Craigslist inches, where it appears 6 inches to both, but is given a more impressive name?

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      JackedupGabrielle Bluestone
      12/10/13 9:18pm

      I moved to Austin.

      I understand

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        nachotacoJackedup
        12/10/13 9:39pm

        Truth.

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      DoctorNineGabrielle Bluestone
      12/10/13 9:55pm

      They found the madman later at his home of record, but were afraid to approach him for fear of communicable diseases.

      GIF
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        cuntybawsGabrielle Bluestone
        12/10/13 11:02pm

        Was he with the little knitted monkey and its minuscule gun?

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          GrowlrBearGabrielle Bluestone
          12/10/13 8:26pm

          After eating six tacos, I'm ready to "liberate some gas".

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            Mdbved602GrowlrBear
            12/10/13 9:23pm

            I would suggest armor to protect from the porcelain shrapnel as well and send rescue because (BLASTOFF!) I would be rocketing off into space.

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            nachotacoGrowlrBear
            12/10/13 9:37pm

            I cackled. Like the fat ass taco eater that I am...

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