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    CavitySearchHamilton Nolan
    9/30/13 9:43am

    $20 says this thread gets more comments than the Government shutdown one.

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      cheerful_exgirlfriendCavitySearch
      9/30/13 9:53am

      People write what they know.

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      Scantron CrothersCavitySearch
      9/30/13 9:57am

      It's their own fault for not titling that other story Get Ready for a Cheeseburger Shutdown.

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    SunburnedAllOverHamilton Nolan
    9/30/13 9:52am

    I live in Amsterdam. What's a drive-thru? Is that like, where you leave your bike on the pavement when you go to a restaurant?

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      BurningTheBurnsSunburnedAllOver
      9/30/13 10:11am

      No. Drive-Thrus are these wonderful places where us car drivers can go and drive through a bunch of cyclists who have been arrested for riding their bikes on busy city roads during rush hour, impeding the flow of traffic.

      These drive-thrus are typically bigger in size than the city of Amsterdam, because we have so many cyclists to run over and so much space here in America to do it with.

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      twizzlerSunburnedAllOver
      9/30/13 10:13am

      It's like one of your automatic, coin-operated crapfood machines, except we drive up to it instead of bike up to it. Get it?

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    Bat-dorkHamilton Nolan
    9/30/13 10:11am

    I'd say the drive-thru model is not exactly efficient to begin with, and a long queue is all it takes to collapse it:

    • There is usually only one window.
    • Food can only be delivered on the same order it was requested.
    • Any special requests (i.e. "no onions please") tend to delay the line.

    Some places have implemented a few creative solutions, such as sending some customers into "waiting areas", or having employees take any ready orders to the car instead of waiting for it to reach the window. However, I often find it faster to simply park and get the order at the counter.

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      benjaminalloverBat-dork
      9/30/13 10:34am

      You have to wonder how "efficient" drive-through really are. There is only one drive-though in my town, a Tim Hortons (I'm Canadian). If you're not familiar with Timmy's, it's terrible coffee and bland sandwiches, and people LOVE it. Like, drive there 7 times a day type love. I always walk when i go (some days the only food place open here) and i'm in and out in 90 seconds while the drive through takes 5 to 10 minutes. I see the same cars idling in the line when i come out as when i went in. Where's the efficiency in that? I think people don't like a) parking b) interacting with people. It has more to do with just not wanting to get out of their cars, i think, than with saving time.

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      memmememememememebenjaminallover
      9/30/13 11:23am

      For me, it was more to avoid having to get my daughter out of her car seat and haul her in and out of the car when she wanted to eat it at home, or we were on the way to school. Less so now, as she's older, but more about me not wanting to deal with that, than saving time. We rarely eat fast food, so it's more of a treat, once in a while, and usually just involves fries or hash browns and maybe a drink on our way home to a real meal.

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    JohnMcClanesSmirkHamilton Nolan
    9/30/13 10:00am

    Maybe its because its early, but this Anti-'murica screed seemed less inspired than your others HamNo. "Can't find country X on the map"? "Political ignorance". "Hating gay people"? "Stuffing our fat faces with processed shit"?

    Dusting off the go-to fly-over pot shots is forgivable, but haphazardly jamming them all in to one post without any other thematic thread reads like a right-wing caricature of what a Manhattan liberal sound like.

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      Mama PenguinoJohnMcClanesSmirk
      9/30/13 10:45am

      I'm guessing Hamilton must be pretty young. I remember being near tears trying to get my mother to understand why it was wrong - wrong! - of her not to feel passionately about all the terrible things people did/said/etc. Drive-thrus are bad! Fat people are bad! People who don't read as many books as I do are bad! People who can't find Syria on a map are bad! And now I look around and see all the people I know just trying to get through another day of work and stay married and raise non-serial killer kids and keep their heads above the water they're ceaselessly treading. The truth is most people don't have the time and energy to waste ranting about shit like fat people on scooters in drive-thrus. Most of us are just trying to live our fucking lives.

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      Alexander_Crouton-SkitchJohnMcClanesSmirk
      9/30/13 11:11am

      Are you going to finish those fries?

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    casenHamilton Nolan
    9/30/13 10:12am

    I'm always amused to see people at the drive thru's. Isn't it way more comfortable to eat at a proper table, plus have access to the bathroom if you need it, than to eat in the car? I have never used a drive thru.

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      laurie305casen
      9/30/13 10:26am

      what? no, you stop at a drive through on your way home from work because you're too goddamn tired to actually make something and then eat it at home.

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      casenlaurie305
      9/30/13 10:30am

      That makes sense. I guess I'm more amused about the lunchtime drive thru's. During lunch, I pass by a few places that have drive thru's and there are always cars in line.

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    Yukon KizmiazHamilton Nolan
    9/30/13 11:05am

    On the occasional occasion when I decide to get fast food, I invariably end up behind:

    a) the Chevy Suburban with 5 kids in it and a parent who is presented with a drive thru menu that has suddenly turned into something harder to understand than Chinese math, or;

    b) the two youngsters who think it's cute to keep changing their order;

    c) the person who asks every possible question about the menu items;

    d) the person who thinks they're ordering duck l'orange at the Four Seasons.

    e) the person too preoccupied with Candy Crush on their smartphone to realize all of the cars ahead of them have long since left, and they're sitting there with 50 feet of open drive thru in front of them;

    f) the person whose order was so complex I'm forced to sit and wait for 10 minutes while it gets sorted out, and by the time I pull up my soda is flat, my fries are cold and starchy, and the fake meat on my burger has congealed, and/or;

    g) I pull up just in time to find out my onion rings have apparently ripped a hole in the fast food time-space continuum, and I need to park and wait for my order. Usually after waiting for person "f" above.

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      JoshDigiYukon Kizmiaz
      9/30/13 11:21am

      If your point is that the average fast food drive thru customer is a horrible, awful, dumb, lazy, selfish, blob of a person then you are definitely on to something.

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      Yukon KizmiazJoshDigi
      9/30/13 11:51am

      I know, right? It's like no one ever made these observations before. I'm like, a genius, or something.

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    cheerful_exgirlfriendHamilton Nolan
    9/30/13 9:54am

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      TheMightyCornholioHamilton Nolan
      9/30/13 9:45am

      I have to say that it always amazes me that people think that waiting for two minutes for food is somehow a problem. If I have to wait five minutes for food that would take me twenty minutes to make myself, I fail to see the problem.

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        Bull MooseTheMightyCornholio
        9/30/13 9:47am

        Because 'Merica!

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        Obvious Burner account, but stillTheMightyCornholio
        9/30/13 9:55am

        MORE than 20 minutes. Can we all acknowledge what a modern miracle instantly-available french fries are? If I had to make those things from scratch every time—all the chopping, chopping, chopping, and the oil spatter everywhere—I would never eat french fries. And what loss that would be!

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      ReX13Hamilton Nolan
      9/30/13 9:48am

      Ok, it's Monday, i'm looking at my second furlough in six months, and i'm under-caffeinated, so i'll be the jerk:

      We've all heard about how jobs that used to be filled by teens and under-educated poors are now being taken by 20-somethings and college-educated poors who can't find employment.

      These smart people are SLOW. (And now we have proof!)

      FIRE THE SMART PEOPLE. Get the pimply-faced teens back — they know how to hop-to. Also, they understand that there is a GIGANTIC FUCKING DIFFERENCE between a Doritos Locos Taco and a COOL RANCH Doritos Locos Taco. I don't have time for these degree-havers to figure out what's important in life: shoveling food through the drive thru at an efficient pace.

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        twizzlerReX13
        9/30/13 10:16am

        Enjoy your furlough and your ranting bothers me none so carry on. Don't military get discounts at Chik Fil Frickin' A, though? They're all Jesus Bots and not smart atall, so just go there and don't bother with Mickey Ds, soldier. McDonalds clearly aims for diversity in hiring, whereas everyone in Chik Fil A uses Crest whitestrips and calls you ma'am and sir.

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        ReX13twizzler
        9/30/13 10:20am

        Full disclosure: I am no longer a military member; i am now a scummy government civilian/parasite on society.

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      hexed13Hamilton Nolan
      9/30/13 9:51am

      Actually, this can be a big problem. The longer the wait for the drive thru and/or the increased use of drive thrus mean there are more cars idling for longer times. This may seem like an insignificant amount of gas wasted, but if you have millions of customers a day, you are talking about millions of gallons. These wasted gallons increase global climate change. (If your one of those that deny climate change, than at least it pollutes the local air). So, while this seems like a first world problem, this actually is an environmental issue. First, we shouldn't be using the drive thru that much. Second, at least minimize the fuel wasted at these things.

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        RationalPlanhexed13
        9/30/13 10:17am

        Or you could just park and walk in.

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        hexed13RationalPlan
        9/30/13 10:21am

        Exactly, that's why I mentioned we shouldn't be using the drive thru that much.

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