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    DoctorNineTaylor Berman
    9/25/13 8:38am

    Meh...

    He's trying to get a Rand Paul popularity bump. That's all this is. And to be fair, for the electorate in his district, this behavior is as popular as girl-on-girl porn on the internet.

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      kimbersaysDoctorNine
      9/25/13 9:00am

      His district is an entire state, unfortunately.

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      DoctorNinekimbersays
      9/25/13 9:26am

      I meant the actual district where he grew up, in Katy. Cruz doesn't represent the majority of the Hispanic electorate in Texas, which still had considerable clout in south/west Texas, and was substantially Democratic (65%D, 35%R) at the last Senate election in 2012:

      What actually surprised me more than anything, was how much support he he DID get in that community, considering the Cuban/Mexican cultural divide.

      So the game he is playing, is to pander to his suburban and rural base.

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    Chris ZimmerTaylor Berman
    9/25/13 8:36am

    STFU Ted

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      DoctorNineChris Zimmer
      9/25/13 9:06am

      Maybe he doesn't see the whole picture yet.

      Do we need to buy him a vowel?

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      mjskyeDoctorNine
      9/25/13 9:28am

      Oh, Doctor, my Doctor.. you win!!

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    secretagentmanTaylor Berman
    9/25/13 8:27am

    What is this black square that keeps popping up on my screen every time I click on a story? It's not even an ad, just a black box that covers most of my screen.

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      Quarteredpoundersecretagentman
      9/25/13 8:35am

      There's a really fascinating the story behind that black box. Apparently, before Oswald was assassinated, he was visited by Lady Bird Johnson, who told him that

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      secretagentmanQuarteredpounder
      9/25/13 8:47am

      I knew it!!

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    HellephantTaylor Berman
    9/25/13 8:14am

    It's amazing that he's been able to masturbate for over 17 hours without climaxing!

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      MuscatoHellephant
      9/25/13 8:24am

      Hmmm. Not quite sure that's the corporeal metaphor that applies; this is more like the legislative equivalent of the dry heaves - unattractive, unproductive, and, for spectators, embarrassment-inducing.

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      Alexander_Crouton-SkitchHellephant
      9/25/13 9:03am

      It's gotta be a big taffy-pull with this d-bag.

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    rewodTaylor Berman
    9/25/13 8:12am

    Since this isn't supposed to prove effective in any way, are we to assume this guy intends to run for national office, and this is his way of introducing himself to the general public?

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      vaulyrearewod
      9/25/13 8:35am

      Yeah, the Freepers are madly masturbating to him.

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      SlickWillierewod
      9/25/13 8:50am

      I'm already working on a campaign poster

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    corey3rdTaylor Berman
    9/25/13 8:54am

    A Man who reads "Green Eggs and Ham" as an example of how we don't want health insurance deserves to have his degrees from Princeton and Harvard yanked for proving he has zero reading comprehensive skills. He must have just been passed through the system to meet the Ivy League's Canadian Content Requirement.

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      VirilityUntoTheecorey3rd
      9/25/13 9:10am

      Ted Cruz just loves Jesse Jackson.

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      enceldus28corey3rd
      9/25/13 9:30am

      Seriously! Why did he pick the book that teaches you to try things before refusing it?

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    Missypoo50Taylor Berman
    9/25/13 8:37am

    This is just sad. Was he picked on as a child? Is he trying to prove all those people who dunked his head in a toilet in high school that he is somebody?

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      kimbersaysMissypoo50
      9/25/13 8:59am

      That would explain why he wouldn't study with anyone from a lesser Ivy...

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      RussianistMissypoo50
      9/25/13 9:26am

      A lot of these libertarian politician have what I call "high school debate team nerd syndrome." Think of the bright but nerdy kid who's been bullied throughout school and then joins the debate team: "I'll show them! When we come back victorious from the regionals due to my superior intellect, I'll be respected just like the jocks and get the girl." When it inevitably doesn't work out that way, they spend the rest of their lives exacting bitter revenge on an ungrateful world.

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    angryliberal0Taylor Berman
    9/25/13 8:30am

    Cruz wears a Scrotum Crown so all the other TBags will love him forever. Because they don't understand that what King Scrotum is doing is all fake and means nothing. But it is so strange that King Scrotum and all of his fanbois/girls are fighting this because they don't want poor people to have access to health insurance. WTF? It's cool to keep oil subsidies, gas subsidies, farm subsidies, etc and so on, but subsidizing health care for poor people, wow, according to King Scrotum is tantamount to being a Nazi appeaser. How does anyone become that craven?

    And what is it about Republicans, are they the sorest losers on the face of the earth? Why is it they have spent all this time trying to refight elections they lost twice. Time for them to get the fuck over it, they lost, now their job is to actually legislate, participate in the system, not shut the system down. These people are such fucking assholes and they continue to be reelected.. King Scrotum... that guy is an ass.

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      DoctorNineangryliberal0
      9/25/13 8:58am

      Just so that I'm clear, which anatomical part are you saying he is, a scrotum, or an ass, or the actual anus itself? I haven't had coffee yet. Help me out over here. Give me a diagram or something.

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      MikeDoctorNine
      9/25/13 10:18am

      Ted Cruz is the taint, asshole and scrotum of a sweaty fat man after a long walk on a hot day.

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    destor23Taylor Berman
    9/25/13 8:38am

    But... but... Piggy has the conch.

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      momofpeanutdestor23
      9/25/13 9:26am
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    CleverUsernameTaylor Berman
    9/25/13 8:21am

    Holy crap. Ted Cruz just criticized "the theater of politics."

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